10 Ways To Manage Stress

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Removing Stress From Your Life

1. We seldom concretely identify those situation and people we find stressful. To understand what brings on stress in your life, try to maintain a heightened awareness of your physical and mental feelings for a week. When you feel your heart racing, your muscles tightening, or your stomach contracting, ask yourself why. Keep a list of those things that trigger stressful feelings.

2. Make relaxation part of your daily routine. Deep breathing and simple stretches can be performed both at home and in the office. Taking a few minutes to sooth your soul by savoring a cup of tea or grounding yourself can center you, giving you the ability to deal with stress more effectively.

3. It can be difficult to let go of worries or thoughts that provoke anxiety. One technique involves dissipating stressful thoughts before they get out of control. Concentrate on the thought and firmly say "Stop" to prevent the thought from recycling itself in your mind. In doing so, you will be free of the thought's power to influence your mood.

4. Get back to nature. Enjoying a relaxing day out of doors can help you feel more calm and balanced during your normal routine. A mountain hike or day at the beach can be a wonderful stress reducer. If you simply can't get away, try listening to a CD of nature sounds or spending a few minutes in front of a sunny window.

5. Each day, give yourself the gift of doing one thing you truly enjoy. It may be writing, gardening, dancing, walking, or watching a good film. Doing something you like every day will improve your quality of life and frame of mind, making you better able to handle stress as it arises.

6. Assess your priorities and learn to say no. Determine what activities you don't want to or can't do at home or at work, and, if you can, stop doing them. Don't overload your schedule by committing to new responsibilities because you are afraid to say no. Instead, dedicate yourself only to the activities that bring you joy.

7. Guided imagery can help you stay relaxed during periods of stress. Take a moment to imagine yourself in a peaceful setting that feels safe and nurturing, perhaps somewhere you have felt lighthearted and calm in the past. Concentrate on your setting until you feel your muscles and mind relax.

8. Exercise affects both the body's energy level and the brain's chemistry by encouraging the release of beneficial hormones. It can also help you let go some of the tension and pent-up energy associated with stress by giving you a healthy outlet for your feelings. The mood-elevating benefits of exercise last for days, but regular exercise is the most uplifting.

9. Take a break. When you're faced with any type of stress, stop for a moment to collect your thoughts. Breathe slowly and deeply for ten seconds and try to clear your mind of unpleasant thoughts. You'll still be facing the same situation, but your outlook will be clearer.

10. When you have compiled a list of stressful triggers, compile a second list outlining your personal methods for dealing with stress. Though unexpected or frustrating situations can seem overwhelming, you have the power to cope. Recognizing your strengths can make dealing with stress seem easier.

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Destiny

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- Unknown Author

During a momentous battle, a Japanese general decided to attack even though his army was greatly outnumbered. He was confident they would win, but his men were filled with doubt.

On the way to the battle, they stopped at a religious shrine. After praying with the men, the general took out a coin and said, "I shall now toss this coin. If it is heads, we shall win. If it is tails we shall lose."

"Destiny will now reveal itself."

He threw the coin into the air and all watched intently as it landed. It was heads. The soldiers were so overjoyed and filled with confidence that they vigorously attacked the enemy and were victorious. After the battle. a lieutenant remarked to the general, "No one can change destiny."

"Quite right," the general replied as he showed the lieutenant the coin, which had heads on both sides.

- Unknown Author

OPPORTUNITY KNOCKS ALL THE TIME

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The race is not to the swift nor the battle to the strong, for time and chance happen to everyone. Take a second look at what appears to be someone's "good luck."
You'll find not luck but preparation, planning and success-producing thinking.

Opportunity is around you all the time, but you have to be ready for it. When your chance comes, you must have the equipment to take advantage of it.

When you're prepared for opportunity, your chance for success is sure to come. The season of failure is the best time for sowing the seeds of success. The tide of opportunity comes to everyone.

©2005 by Max Steingart

Internal Spring Cleaning

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Digestive System Cleansing

A cleanse is used for a number of reasons, mostly to detoxify the digestive system, but also as a means to clear the mind. Of course internal cleansing is not done daily, but many people do engage in ritual cleansing, sometimes annually, bi-annually, or even more often. Cleansing may be done to detoxify before starting a new dietary regime, to mark an occasion, or as part of a spiritual observance.

The benefits are numerous. Regularly cleansing helps the body release toxins that come from exposure to food additives, household chemicals, and pollution. Cleansing reduces stress on the digestive system, by supporting the elimination systems and other organs.

And, there are many ways to cleanse. Detoxification programs may include digesting activated charcoal, bentonite clay, dietary fibers and supplements, or subsisting on fruit, vegetables, juices or simply water. Cleanses lasts for a few days or as long as two weeks, but dietary restrictions are meant to be short term. Just long enough to flush toxins from the body.

Meditation and massage are wonderful enhancements to cleansing, allowing the mind and spirit to unite with the body in releasing not only toxins, but bad habits and negative emotions as well. Massage assists in detoxification by simulating sluggish lymphatic systems and circulation. Dry skin brushing unblock pores and stimulates the work of the lymphatic system. Cleansing can enhance meditation and vice versa. The mind becomes clearer and focus is intensified, allowing for new insights and a deeper connection to the spirit.

An ancient method of healing and rejuvenation, cleansing enhances health and spiritual development. A cleanse is a sort of internal spring cleaning that not only frees your body of waste, but your mind and soul as well. If you are interested in performing a cleanse, there are many good books and websites, or see your doctor.

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Positive Emotions Are The Key To Life

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- By Brian Tracy

Positive emotional energy is the key to health, happiness and wellbeing. The more positive you are, the better your life will be in every area.

Your Main Energy Source

Here’s the important point. Positive emotions give you energy, while negative emotions deplete your energy. When you are excited and happy and are interacting with people you love and enjoy, you sparkle with energy and enthusiasm. When you are angry or depressed, or negative for any reason, you feel tired and frustrated and, eventually, burned out.

You Burn A Lot of Energy

It takes 1,000 units of physical energy to operate your body and you do not do physical labor, that physical energy can be refined in your body to produce 100 units of emotional energy.

Emotional energy is a far more refined form of energy, and it is absolutely essential to healthy emotional functioning.

Creating Mental Energy

If you do not consume all your energy units in the expression of negative emotions, such as fear, doubt, anger, and resentment, your emotional energies are conserved. If your energy is conserved at one level, your body continues to refine it into higher and better energy. 100 units of emotional energy thus conserved will be refined by your body into 10 units of mental energy.

Anger Is A Killer

You’ve probably heard someone described as “shaking with anger.” When a person is shaking with anger, it is an indication that he has burned up the glucose or sugar-based energy in his system, and he is actually weak from his angry outburst.

The Benefits of Pausing

All successful people are very productive. They work longer hours and they work better hours. They get a lot more done than the average person. They get paid more and promoted faster. They are highly respected and esteemed by everyone around them. They become leaders and role models. Inevitably, they rise to the top of their fields and to the top of their income ranges, and so can you.

Don’t Take Things Personally

They stand back and refuse to take things personally. They do not allow themselves to get drawn into arguments or other people’s problems. They save their energy for more productive purposes.

The whole purpose of physical relaxation is to allow yourself to recharge your emotional and mental batteries. You don’t engage in physical relaxation so much to relax your physical body because it’s likely you don’t work that hard with your body. The aim of rest and relaxation is more to build up your mental and emotional energies and thereby improve the overall quality of your life.

Keep Yourself Calm

Another characteristic of very successful people is that they keep themselves calm much longer than the average person does. They are more relaxed, more genial, and more in control of their emotions. They are very aware that expressions of negative emotion deprive them of the energy they need to be effective in the more important things they do. They don’t allow themselves to become upset or angry over little things, or even over large things. They remain objective and detached.

Action Exercises

Here are three things you can do immediately to put these ideas into action:

First, keep your thoughts on your dreams and goals, and keep them off of the things and people that cause you stress and negative emotions. This is not easy, but it’s very important.

Second, preserve your emotional energy by staying calm and positive in difficult situations rather than allowing yourself to be upset or angry.

Third, take ample time to rest completely so you can recharge your physical and emotional batteries. The better rested you are, the more effective you will be.

- Brian Tracy

YOU CAN MAKE UP YOUR MIND TO BE ANYTHING

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You're special and unique among all the creatures on the planet earth. You've been endowed with the capacity and the power to create desirable pictures inside your mind and to find them automatically printed in the outer world of your environment.

You'll gradually grow into any condition you desire, provided you first make yourself in habitual mental attitude the person who corresponds to that condition.

Picture yourself vividly as winning, and that alone will contribute immeasurably to your success. All your dreams can come true, if you have the courage to pursue them.

©2005 by Max Steingart

Joyful Practice

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The Life of a Monk

Joyful discipline and dedication that come from within are the foundations of the life of a monk. Their days are filled not only with solitary contemplation and prayer, but also with labor, the challenges of maintaining relationships, and the quest for knowledge. There is a unique balance that those dedicated to a life of spiritual contemplation must seek out and achieve for they, like anyone else, are subject to everyday concerns. Yet they remain true to their intensely focused mode of perception, striving for spiritual enlightenment through structure and community. It is possible to emulate the life of a monk, to find a middle point between all extremes, in order to live a more content and spiritually fulfilling.

The first step in bringing the monastic light into your own life is to cut down on distractions while recognizing the importance of fellowship. A monk's place of meditation or prayer is often far from any place that could interfere with concentration. Yet monks do not eschew community and in fact embrace it, because interpersonal relationships can be a means to growth and increased learning. Not every monk abandons all worldly pleasures. Rather, the majority choose to attain contentment through a life of extreme structure and simplicity of food, clothing, and possessions. Doing so frees the mind from overly worldly concerns but does not detract from the enjoyment of the things they do possess. Part of a monk's daily meditations focus not only on striving for goodness, but also understanding and diminishing negativity. Their practices, however, extend beyond the meditation chamber and into their daily lives. Each monk attempts to embody his or her vision of spiritual perfection. They also recognize that failures occur, but are merely obstacles to be overcome.

The discipline inherent in monastic life - the regimen of prayer, sleeping and waking, silence, and diet - is freely chosen and not necessarily experienced as hardship. The monk's life is joyful, though deliberate. When you practice your own everyday regimen of a regularly scheduled mediation, a structured diet, or simple kindness, mindfulness, and simplicity, you are tapping into the world of peace experienced by monks of all faiths.

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Don't Be Afraid to Fail

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You've failed many times, although you may not remember. You fell down the first time you tried to walk. You almost drowned the first time you tried to swim, didn't you? Did you hit the ball the first time you swung a bat? Heavy hitters, the ones who hit the most home runs, also strike out a lot.

R.H. Macy failed seven times before his store in New York caught on. English novelist John Creasey got 753 rejection slips before he published 564 books. Babe Ruth struck out 1,330 times, but he also hit 714 home runs. Don't worry about failure. Worry about the chances you miss when you don't even try.

- Message published in the Wall Street Journal

IF YOU WANT IT, YOU CAN HAVE IT

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If you're willing to pay the price, any of your circumstances will change. If you want something badly enough, you're sure to get it. The key to success is desire.

Obstacles don't matter very much. Pain, circumstances or other challenges can be there. But if you want to do something bad enough, you'll find a way to get it done.

Your desire will in time externalize itself into concrete fact. Your reality will form around your commitment to succeed.

You only have to love a thing greatly to get it. Desire is the fire of life.

©2005 by Max Steingart

Phase Tracking

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Synchronizing With The Moon

In the modern world, we spend so much time indoors, it is easy to lose track of the moon. Very few people could answer with confidence what phase the moon is in at any given time. Is it full or new? Is it waxing or waning? But if you decide to become aware of the moon, it can be very rewarding to observe it as it waxes to full and wanes to darkness every month. Just knowing what's going on with the moon helps us feel more connected to the shifting of the natural world. It also offers the possibility of harmonizing our own energy with natural rhythms.

New moons are good times to begin things, from planting a garden to dreaming up a new goal or vision. The energy of the waxing, expanding moon influences all things to grow. Full moons are good times for completion. If there is a project you want to finish, aim to finalize it by the time of the full moon. As the moon wanes back into darkness, allow yourself to be emptied, swept clean for the new project, or the new commitment, that the new moon will bring. Utilize the energy of the waning moon when you are ready to cleanse, or release something you no longer want or need. During these times, integrate more stillness and introspection into your schedule.

Most calendars keep track of the full and new moon, but you can also buy much more detailed lunar calendars that show the phases of the moon for an entire year. Of course, the easiest and best way to track the moon is the natural way, looking for it every night, and observing it. After doing this for a while, you will begin to feel a kinship with the moon, knowing where it is in its cycle and feeling its influence on your life.

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Mental Alchemy

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– By Edwin Harkness Spina

Back in the Middle Ages alchemists sought to transform base metal into gold. They searched for an elusive substance, the philosopher’s stone, which would bring about this conversion, known as alchemy. But to initiates of the ancient mystery schools, alchemy was primarily an allegory for the real work of spiritual and mental alchemy.

Spiritual alchemy is the process of transforming a less evolved soul personality into a more refined one. The founders of all major religions have attempted to expedite this transformation by providing rules to help people achieve this goal and also lead happier and more productive lives. Enlightenment, illumination, the perfection of the soul all point to this ultimate goal. Mystics from all religions have studied the universal laws to speed up this process, which they believe occurs over many lifetimes.

Mental alchemy is the process of transmuting your thoughts to improve your life and expand your mind. The good news is that this discipline can produce immediate, beneficial results in your current life, in some cases instantly.

Mental alchemy involves the replacement of beliefs that are hindering your development with positive ones that will help you. You might say that sounds straightforward—why would this be so difficult?

It turns out it’s extremely difficult to change beliefs. There are three reasons for this:

1) Most people mistake their beliefs for the truth. Even if it’s not in their best interest, some people resign themselves to their fate because they mistakenly accept a belief as true.

2) Beliefs operate at the subconscious level. Most people are unaware of their subconscious beliefs, which are often in conflict with their conscious thoughts. For example, a woman may consciously be seeking love, but subconsciously she may feel she’s unworthy. Unless her belief is made conscious and transmuted, it will continue to sabotage her efforts.

3) You see what you believe. Less than 100 years ago physicists were trying to determine whether light was a wave or a particle. The answer depended on what you believed you would find. If you believed light was made of particles, then you could design an experiment that proved it. Conversely, if you believed light consisted of waves then you could design another experiment to prove that.

The placebo effect provides another example. In drug trials required to gain FDA approval, 40% of patients, on average, will obtain relief from placebos. They get better simply because they believe they will get better. Placebos have actually helped people with Parkinson’s disease.

The mystic principle behind these results is called the Law of Attraction or “like attracts like.” In the mystic world, and now in the world of quantum physics, we know that everything is energy. Everything has its own vibration, including a belief. People attract to themselves those experiences that match their existing belief system. They get to see what they believe.

So how does Mental Alchemy work?

Neurologists tell us the brain doesn’t know the difference between what’s actually experienced and what’s imagined to be experienced. The same electrical patterns are fired between the neurons in the brain. The electrical patterns in the brain reflect how we store and process information, including beliefs.

The ramification of this is profound: you can change your beliefs using your imagination. It doesn’t matter whether the belief is true or not.

Let’s take an example of a basketball player who misses the final shot of the state championship game and his team ends up losing by one point. This experience can be traumatic and will often reinforce negative beliefs that he’s a choker or a loser. Had he made the shot, he would be a hero and filled with the confidence of a winner.

Let’s say you are the basketball player. What should you do?

First, go to a quiet place where you won’t be disturbed for 10–15 minutes. Make sure that none of your objective senses (sight, hearing, smell, touch, taste) is being stimulated. Take a few deep breaths. Your goal is to relax and get into an alpha state. Scientists have shown that you can learn new skills much more readily while in this state. Meditation is ideal for this.

At this point, you should replay the end of the game in your mind. Only this time, when you take the final shot, do it with confidence and watch it go in. Visualize all the fans going wild as the buzzer sounds and your teammates carry you off the court. Involve all your senses and imagine how it feels to be the hero!

Michael Jordan is arguably the greatest basketball player of all time, but he probably missed just as many shots at the end of the game as he made. But you can be quite certain he didn’t dwell on the missed shots, but simply remembered the game-winning shots. You can do the same. Use the technique of Mental Alchemy and change your life.

About the Author:

Edwin Harkness Spina is the author of "Mystic Warrior: A Novel Beyond Time and Space," a contemporary thriller with spiritual overtones. Ed earned an MBA from the University of Chicago, a BSE from Tufts University, and has been studying and practicing mysticism for many years. For more information visit http://www.MysticWarrior.us

YOU ARE MORE IMPORTANT THAN YOUR PROBLEMS

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Your obstacles will always look large or small to you according to whether you are large or small.

Understanding this will give you the courage necessary to overcome your problems. Courage gives you the capacity to confront what can be imagined. It gives you the ability to rise above reality.

Face your difficulties directly and you'll always win. You are bigger than your problems.

©2005 by Max Steingart

Trusting Your Gut

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Listening To Intuition

Decisions that you may not be satisfied with can lead you to ask yourself how could I have made one choice, when my gut feeling pointed to the other. Because we can look to the past and imagine the future with clarity, there exists a tendency to mull over even minor choices and to over-analyze people and situations. But when we choose to put aside reasoning processes for just a moment, insights may be revealed. Listening to your intuitive mind allows you to access a natural cache of wisdom within. You may find that in "trusting your gut," your innate sense of what is right and wrong will become both strong and reliable.

Intuitive or gut-level reactions may seem less credible than decisions based on logic or carefully weighed facts because intuition is perceived by most as a less intelligent way of coming to conclusions. Every person is naturally intuitive, even if you have not learned to tap into it. You may also discount your gut feelings, even when they turn out to be right, because you may be afraid of what others will say.

To get in touch with your intuition, first pay attention to sudden perceptions and feelings, even if nothing more than a prickling of the hairs on the back of your neck. Acknowledge it and let go of your fear of being wrong. Trust your inner voice. Keep track of these instances in a journal and, regardless of your decision in each case, decide whether your intuitive feeling was correct. If you already have strong gut feelings, practice acting on those feelings without fear. Don't let doubt keep you from embracing them.

There is no substitute for being prepared, and knowing that you can comfortably trust in your gut feelings can be a vital part of preparedness. With it as a tool in your life, it is possible to consider every situation or dilemma in a unique, insightful, and personal way.

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This week's eMeditation

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- By Vic Johnson

"All achievements, whether in the business, intellectual, or spiritual world, are the result of definitely directed thought." - As A Man Thinketh

Have you ever heard the expression that most people spend more time planning their vacation than they do planning their lives? I would expand that expression by adding that most people spend more time "thinking" about their vacation than they do thinking about what's important in their life.

While rest and relaxation are a must in living a balanced life, it's not what we were created to do. After all, the Master Creator took his R&R on the seventh day, only after six days of "definitely directed thought."

Wallace D. Wattles wrote "There is no labor from which most people shrink as they do from that of sustained and consecutive thought; it is the hardest work in the world." And yet it is the first and primary labor of achievement.

Have you given some “definitely directed thought” to your life's purpose or your personal mission statement? Is it written down? Do you review it and think about it often? Is your life organized around your purpose and a set of goals that support that purpose? Are the actions you take everyday in harmony with your purpose?

Without purpose and goals - definitely directed thought - you are like the proverbial "ship without a rudder," wandering everywhere while going nowhere. There is power in your purpose and in your goals. It is the power that takes you over obstacles, the fuel that propels you toward the life you envision. As Bob Proctor says, “Purpose gives meaning to WHY you’re doing what you’re doing.”

And that's worth thinking about.

- Vic Johnson

EXPECTATION COMES BEFORE ACHIEVEMENT

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Your aspirations are your possibilities. If you want to be big, you have to think big.Your only limits are those of vision. The more you can dream, the more you can be.

Don't ever stop dreaming. For when you cease dreaming, you cease living.

Cherish your dreams for they are the blueprints to your ultimate success. If you don't have a dream, how are you going to make it come true?

The greatest achievements always take place in the framework of great expectations. Big thinking will always come before big achievement.

©2005 by Max Steingart

Sharing Wisdom

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Becoming A Mentor

Most often, we think of mentors in terms of successful, professional adults taking disadvantaged youths under their wings, encouraging them to pursue higher education and attain lofty career goals. Yet, anyone, old or young, formally educated or street smart, can be a mentor. We all can, and should, be mentors and we can mentor anyone of any age, gender, race, or socio-economic background.

Simply defined, a mentor is a wise and trusted person. We all have wisdom to share and we should feel honored when someone trusts us enough to ask for our guidance. We then have the opportunity to trust in ourselves and our judgment. We come to know that we have the innate good sense to impart our life experience (no matter how long we've lived) and the knowledge we've gained to be of value and service to others. We can help someone discover themselves and their potential, show them their own brilliance, and guide them in defining and achieving any goals they may have. Mentoring allows us to expose others to new experiences and introduce them to new ideas. In turn, we discover and learn new things about ourselves.

Many of us mentor others even when we're not aware we're doing it. The grandmother who teaches a child how to knit is a mentor, for she not only teaches stitches, she passes on her knowledge of an age old craft and encourages a child to be creative. We may even think of our own children as our mentors, allowing us to view life from the beginning, bringing out our silly side, and showing us how to love unconditionally.

There are many kinds of mentors and though we may feel intimidated by the responsibility, it is a role we should embrace. We are here on earth to learn and to pass on life's lessons to others. Whether we mentor someone throughout their life with guidance and counsel or for just a moment by letting someone confide in us, we are doing a valuable service. When someone reaches out, take their hand. They are saying that they trust your wisdom.

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The Power of Saying “No”

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– By Linda D. Tillman, Ph.D. **

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"No" is such a simple word....
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only two letters. Yet saying "No" out loud is harder for most people than saying, "I'll be glad to..." (eleven letters) or "When do you need me to..." (seventeen letters)

Most of us said, "No!" quite well when we were two. After all, it's the two-year-old's job to say "No." The authority figures in our lives at the time, our parents, expect us to say "No." And it is because of "No" that the year is known as the Terrible Two's.

Many of us grow up to be people pleasers. The word "No" drops out of our vocabulary, and we substitute lots of ways to be agreeable and keep the other person happy. Saying "No" to the authority figures is not expected. And underneath it all we believe that saying "No" can cost us a lot in our adult life.

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The unassertive "No"
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is accompanied by weak excuses and rationalizations. If you lack confidence when you say "No" you may think that you need to support your "No" with lots of reasons to convince the other person that you mean it.

You might even make up an excuse to support your "No." This can backfire if the lie is exposed and again, you will sound ineffective because you need to have an excuse to support your stand.

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The aggressive "No"
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is done with contempt. "Are you kidding? Me, get your mail while you're out of town?"

Sometimes the aggressive "No" includes an attack on the person making the request. "You must be crazy. I couldn't take on a project that unimportant."

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The assertive "No"
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is simple and direct. "No, I won't be able to help with that." If you would like to offer an explanation, make it short and simple. "No, I won't be able to help with that. I've already made a commitment for Friday afternoon."

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Strategies to make the assertive "No" easier
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1. When someone makes a request, it is always OK to *ASK FOR TIME TO THINK IT OVER*. In thinking it over, remind yourself that the decision is entirely up to you.

2. Use your nonverbal assertiveness to underline the "No." Make sure that your voice is firm and direct. Look into the person's eyes as you say, "No." Shake your head "No," as you say, "No."

3. Remember that "No," is an honorable response. If you decide that "No" is the answer that you prefer to give, then it is authentic and honest for you to say, "No."

4. If you say, "Yes," when you want to say, "No," you will feel resentful throughout whatever you agreed to do. This costs you energy and discomfort and is not necessary if you just say, "No" when you need to.

5. If you are saying, "No," to someone whom you would help under different circumstances, use an empathic response to ease the rejection. For example, to your friend who needs you to keep her child while she goes to the doctor, you might say, "No, Susie, I can't keep Billie for you. I know it must be hard for you to find someone at that time of day, but I have already made lunch plans and I won't be able to help you.

6. Start your sentence with the word, "No." It's easier to keep the commitment to say, "No," if it's the first word out of your mouth.

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Practicing for the World Series
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Let's look at some daily ways you can practice saying, "No," so that it comes more naturally to you. Paulette Dale in her book, ‘Did You Say Something, Susan?’ suggests some simple ways to practice saying, "No." Here are some of her suggestions:

Say "No,"
to the clerk who wants to write your phone number down when you return something to the store; to the telemarketer who disturbs your dinner; to the perfume demonstrator at the department store; to your friend's pets when they jump on you; to the secretary who answers the phone and asks if you mind if she puts you on hold.

Make it a project to say, "No," to something every day.

When you do, notice it and give yourself credit for practicing saying such an important two letter word.

About the Author:

Linda D. Tillman, Ph.D. is a clinical psychologist and coach, working with people to speak up for themselves in life and work. You can find her web site at www.speakupforyourself.com. Her email address is: linda@speakupforyourself.com

SUCCESSFUL PEOPLE MAKE DECISIONS

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If you don't run your own life, someone else will. You're in control of your life to the degree that you make decisions.

To control the outcome of anything, you control the action at the point of decision making. If you let others make decisions for you, you give up control. When you control the decisions, you control the actions.

Take charge of your life, so there is no longer a need to ask permission of others. When you ask permission, you're giving someone "veto" power over your life.

Only you are responsible for your life. Take control and start making those decisions.

©2005 by Max Steingart

Divine Guardians

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Using Angels For Protection

While most of us cannot see them, the universe is nonetheless filled with angels representing many purposes. Angels are often called upon to help comfort us, but they can also be called upon to help us with protection. Many people who are receptive to spiritual forces can sense or even physically feel the protective presence of angels, but anyone, even those who have never before received angelic protection, can access it. All you must do is ask. Angels cannot interfere in any way with your life unless you invite them to, yet they are our willing protectors and expect nothing in return. Once you have called upon angels, however, you will most likely never know how many times they have helped delivered you from harm.

Asking for protection or guidance needn't be complex and there is no limit to the number of angels you can have to help you. You may wish to meditate or say a prayer, but all that's necessary is a direct request. Reach out with your heart and mind, and voice your request out loud. Ask that angels surround and protect your home, or car, whatever it is that you want help protecting. It's helpful to visualize what your new guardian angels are doing. See them forming a protective ring around your automobile, riding in the seat next to you if you are scared, or stand ready at your home's doors and windows while you are away. You may feel more confident if you know an angel is always right beside you, protecting you from physical and emotional injury. Angelic protection can extend beyond the physical and into the realm of emotion, if that is what you desire.

If you're unsure whether you have successfully called upon an angel, try tuning out your senses and feeling with your heart. If you are receptive to it, there is a chance that you will feel your companion angels as warmth. If you wish you can refer to the angels you call upon as guides or protectors. However you refer to angels, practice being aware of them and remember that if you ask for one, there will always be a divine presence watching over you.

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A World of Smiles, Love and Warmth

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- Author unknown

About ten years ago when I was an undergraduate in college, I was working as an intern at my University's Museum of Natural History.

One day while working at the cash register in the gift shop, I saw an elderly couple come in with a little girl in a wheelchair. As I looked closer at this girl, I saw that she was kind of perched on her chair. I then realized she had no arms or legs, just a head, neck and torso. She was wearing a little white dress with red polka dots.

As the couple wheeled her up to me I was looking down at the register. I turned my head toward the girl and gave her a wink. As I took the money from her grandparents, I looked back at the girl, who was giving me the cutest, largest smile I have ever seen. All of a sudden her handicap was gone and all I saw was this beautiful girl, whose smile just melted me and almost instantly gave me a completely new sense of what life is all about.

She took me from a poor, unhappy college student and brought me into her world; a world of smiles, love and warmth. That was ten years ago. I'm a successful business person now and whenever I get down and think about the troubles of the world, I think about that little girl and the remarkable lesson about life that she taught me.

- Author unknown

YOU HAVE UNLIMITED POTENTIAL

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No matter what the level of your ability is, you have more potential than you can ever develop in a lifetime.

Don't think about the things you can't do. Think about the things you can do. There is no such thing as no chance.

You have powers you never dreamed of. You can do things you never thought you could do. There are no limitations to what you can do except the limitations of your own mind.

Your range of available choices right now is limitless. Look at things as they can be. Never say never.

©2005 by Max Steingart

Power Of Action

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Avoiding Stagnation

Many people believe their journeys are taking them to some end where their lives will reach a plateau. They envision their days being similar in nature, with few upsets or alterations. But they have forgotten that change and action are vital parts of existence - steps that at times inspire us gently and, at other times, goads us on roughly. To stagnate is to turn your self into your own roadblock. It can bring your personal growth to a halt. It is possible to forget that your choices, actions, and ability to create are the keys to your happiness and fulfillment. When faced with a negative situation, it can seem easier to stay put and not rock the boat. And when settled into a positive situation, making new choices and starting new projects can feel like too much effort.

But everyone needs mental motion to continue to grow, and that requires that you keep taking action. Letting yourself fall into a slump can lead to depression and leave you wondering why you were once excited about life. If you begin to feel that you're stagnating in a job, a situation, a relationship, or even a mental state, ask yourself what choices you can make to help yourself move on. Or, if you are in a satisfying place in your life, what activities you can do or projects you can undertake to spice up your mindset. Remind yourself that when one project or phase of life has been completed, it's only natural to begin the next. Likewise, don't get caught up in believing that your life has truly reached a standstill. There is always some choice or action, however small or seemingly insignificant, that will help you to abolish your roadblock and move ahead.

Stagnation can always be avoided, no matter what your situation, by trying something new. While casting off the burden of an unsatisfying job may be too drastic a change, learning to rock climb or tap dance, enjoying a new style of cuisine, or becoming involved in a hobby are all means to push forward, to continue learning and growing, and to walk the most enlightening path.

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Promise Yourself

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- C.D. Larson

Promise Yourself

To be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind; To talk health, happiness, and prosperity to every person you meet; To make all your friends feel that there is something in them; To look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimism come true; To think only the best, to work only for the best, and to expect only the best; To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as you are about your own; To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future; To wear a cheerful countenance at all times and give every living creature you meet a smile; To give so much time to the improvement of yourself that you have no time to criticize others; To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear; and too happy to permit the presence of trouble; To think well of yourself and to proclaim this fact to the world, not in loud words, but in great deeds; To live in the faith that the whole world is on your side so long as you are true to the best that is in you.

- C.D. Larson

HAPPINESS LIES IN THE JOY OF ACHIEVEMENT

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You were built to conquer your environment, solve problems, and achieve goals. You'll find no real satisfaction or happiness in life without obstacles to conquer and goals to achieve.

True happiness lies in activity. It's a running river not a stagnant pond. Happiness is not in having or being, it's in doing something you love.

The secret of happiness is in having something to do. Happiness is a byproduct, you cannot pursue it by itself.

©2005 by Max Steingart

Beautiful Proportion

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The Golden Ratio

One wouldn't think of a simple rectangle as necessarily pleasing to the eye. But one rectangle has, throughout history, formed the basis of not only art, sculpture, and architecture, but the proportions of plants, flowers, DNA, and even the human face and body. It is the rectangle formed by the golden ratio, which the Egyptians called the "sacred ratio" and is also known as the divine proportion, wherein the ratio of the length to the width equals 1.618 (a number called Phi). For thousands of years, that ratio was the aesthetic guide in art and building. It creates structures and compositions that are considered the most wonderful to look at because the human eye perceives the golden rectangle as a particularly pleasing geometric form. It is the marriage of mathematics and beauty.

Many creations by artists, musicians and architects have been shaped both knowingly and unknowingly by the golden ratio. The Greeks and Romans used the golden ratio extensively in their creation of temples, which in turn inspired later people to do likewise. Painters, including Leonardo Da Vinci and composers like Mozart and Beethoven utilized the golden ratio in their work. Modern artists and architects use the golden rectangle as well, and example being the United Nations building in New York City. In nature, the golden ratio ensures survival in plants and animals. Most leafed plants space their foliage in proportions that correspond to the golden ratio in order to ensure that every leaf gets light. The pattern in spiral shells, which are some of the most beautiful things in nature, is also based on the ratio. Even viruses are shaped according to the ratio.

Designer Le Corbusier believed that the human soul was unconsciously comforted by mathematics and the ancient Greeks said that all beauty was indeed math. Because the proportions given by the golden ratio are natural and often unconsciously used, it can seem unimportant. But an understanding of the ratio can open the doors to a more profound understanding of what lies beneath aesthetic appreciation.

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How to Squeeze the Most Out of Your Time

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– By Brian Tracy

How do you start your day? Years ago I started planning mine by writing everything down I would have to do, the night before. I found that drawing up your list the night before prompts your subconscious to work on your plans and goals while you sleep. When you wake up, you feel ready to tackle your challenges.

When prioritizing and planning your time, consider the following points:

- Key questions.

What is the highest value-added action I can do? What can I and only I do that I've done well before to make a difference? Why am I on the payroll? The answers to these questions help identify all that needs to be done and in what order. That, in turn, will bolster personal productivity.

- Values.

Decide what's important to you, and in what order. Make sure your values don't conflict with work. Energy spent worrying diminishes your abilities.

- Consequences.

Every action has consequences - good and bad. Consider what rewards you'd reap by completing a task. Then, compare those rewards with the consequences of putting it aside. This process makes it easier to see which goals have a higher value.

- The Pareto Principle.

Vilfredo Pareto, a 19th-century engineer, argued that 20% of what you do accounts for 80% of the value. When considering the importance of a task, ask yourself whether it's among the 20% that creates the most value.

- Urgency vs. Importance.

An unexpected phone call or a drop-in visitor may be urgent, but the consequences of dealing with either may not be important in the long run. The urgent is other-oriented, it's caused by someone else. Important things are self-directed and have the greatest value for you.

- The Limiting Step.

Standing between you and what you want to achieve is the limiting step. That's the bottleneck that determines how quickly you can reach your goal. It's important to identify that step and focus single-mindedly on getting that one thing done.

- A Written Plan.

Lists of goals, tasks and objectives are of no help unless they're written. Putting your plans on paper makes a seemingly elusive goal more concrete. There's a connection that takes place between the brain and the hand. When you don't write it down, it's fuzzy, but as you write it and revise it, it becomes clear.

- Visualization.

See yourself doing what you need to get done. Visualization trains the subconscious to focus on completing tasks. Say, for example, that you want to begin each morning by exercising. Visualizing yourself doing sit-ups and push-ups the night before conditions the mind to do those the next day. When you prime you mind, it wakes you up even before the alarm clock goes off.

Remember you are a winner and preparation goes a long way in helping you achieve all your goals.

- Brian Tracy

YOUR LIFE WILL RESPOND TO YOUR OUTLOOK

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Life is largely a matter of expectation. If you want to succeed, you must expect to succeed.

When you expect things to happen, strangely enough, they do happen. Expectation energizes your goals and give them momentum. When you believe something good can happen, it will happen.

Set your goals high. If you want to succeed beyond your wildest expectations you have to begin with some wild expectations.

The dreams you believe in come to be.

©2005 by Max Steingart

Moving Into A New Phase

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Outgrowing Friends

Every one of us lives a life colored by individual and changing experiences, perceptions, needs, and desires. We connect with others, becoming friends and confidants, most often because they share something with us, such as an interest or need. But as time goes on there is change, and the bonds that brought you close to a treasured friend may not be enough to sustain the relationship. You may find your lives have gone in wildly different directions and you no longer share the same aspirations, or you may have changed on an energetic level. It is not unusual in such a situation to find that the comfort you found in the other person has vanished and that you have trouble relating as you once did. Outgrowing a friend can be confusing or painful, but it is a natural part of one's personal growth.

You have a right to choose to surround yourself with those people who understand you, are helpful and compassionate, and put you at ease. Months or years into a friendship, you may find your friend no longer seems like the same person he or she once was. The change may have been within them, but may also have come from within you. Moving on does not mean that your past shared experiences were not meaningful or important to you both, but rather it acknowledges your needs in the present. Ending a friendship can be difficult. You may not feel comfortable explaining your reasons for doing so. Even so, you can still be kind, respectful, and considerate, and simply state that you can no longer devote time to the friendship. When you have made the conscious decision to let go of the relationship, it will most likely happen naturally.

The people who are or have been a part of your life each taught you something. Some friendships are long-term while others are brief. In all relationships, however, it is important to embrace changes and to let go of regrets. While you may outgrow the need to maintain a friendship with someone who was once very special to you, that person will nonetheless always occupy a place in your heart.

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Three F's and a Challenge

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– By Steve Errey

It’s no secret that life is a tricky animal to understand and it’s even harder to tame it so that it delivers what you want. But from my work in the world of personal development I've figured out three simple things that can transform any situation, any problem, any issue...and any life. Three things that once in place can bring the best out of you, bring the best to you and allows you to enjoy all of it. What are these three things? I call them the Three F's - Fun, Fulfillment and Freedom.

Here are a few definitions from the dictionary.

Fun, n. - A source of enjoyment or pleasure; playful activity.

Ful-fil'ment, n. - To bring into actuality; to complete; a feeling of satisfaction at having achieved your desires.

Free-dom, n. - The capacity to exercise choice, free will; frankness or boldness; the absence of constraint in choice or action.

Read those again and really let them sink in.

Fun is about being playful, recognising the moment you’re in and enjoying what's happening right now. Fulfillment is about following your desires, making things happen and the feeling of completeness we get from that. Freedom is about embracing choice, being yourself and removing the barriers and constraints in what we do.

Those things are huge, deep and broad and we have a tendency overcomplicate them. In fact those things are simple, and only become complex when we make them complex. Here's what I want you to do,

1. Take a moment to consider where you are in your life right now, and rate yourself on a scale of 1 to 10 (with 10 being your ultimate capability) for each of the Three F's. Be honest. Wherever you put yourself is okay - there are no wrong answers.

2. On the same scale from 1 to 10, ask yourself where you would love to be on each of the Three F's. Are you happy with where you are? Would you like more of the Three F’s? If so, how high would you like to go?

3. The gap between where you are and where you want to be is your opportunity, and that’s your individual challenge. People do amazing things every single day and all kinds of things are possible in life, so recognise that the gap can be closed, and that you can close it. The question is - do you want to?

4. If you answered ‘Yes’ and you do want to rise to your challenge and close that gap, then go ahead and skip straight to the next step. If you're hesitating that's okay too – changing things and challenging yourself can be scary stuff. Get clear on the pay-offs and what’s in it for you by asking yourself - What would things be like if you were to close the gap? What would you be able to do when you get to where you want to be? How would you feel?

Find something that gives you butterflies, find something compelling, shiny or attractive and then acknowledge that it's possible for you to get there, that you're capable of getting there and you deserve to get there.

5. For each of the Three F's, what one thing can you do this month that would take you forwards? What single action can you take to rise to your challenge? Write down one specific action for each of the Three F’s and put a deadline on each.

6. Look a little further ahead and come up with three things you can do before the year is out that would take you forwards on each of the Three F’s. By the end of the year how close to meeting your challenge do you want to be? How much of that gap do you want to close this year? What can you do to rise to your challenge? Write down three specific actions for each one.

Maybe spending more time with friends or family or improving your work/life balance would bring you more fun – if so, how are you going to start?

Maybe setting and reaching a goal or completing a project you're already involved in would bring you more fulfilment – great, what do you want to commit to so that you hit those targets?

Maybe letting go of something that hurts, confronting a limiting belief or simply choosing to move forwards in your life with the Three F's in mind would bring you more freedom – what will allow you to feel more free?

Whatever your challenge and whatever your actions – don’t cheat yourself by not following through. Set yourself specific targets and actions, be sure to commit to what you want and follow through with those decisions and actions.

Singly, each of the Three F's is a powerful thing and can really help you to move forwards, enjoy where you are in life and feel alive. But when the Three F's come together....well, just hold on to your hats and keys, because you're about to have, do and be more....

About the Author:

Steve Errey’s free ezine ‘Being More’ shows you proven ways that YOU can have, do and be more than you thought possible. By signing up you’ll also receive a special report titled ‘5 Little Secrets Other Coaches Won’t Tell You’ – visit www.steveerrey.com now.

Steve Errey specialises in personal growth for thirtysomethings and coaches thirtysomething singles and couples around their careers, relationships and confidence. He’s featured widely in national press and media, writes the 'Thirtysomething Guide to... series of ebooks, has had regular coaching slots on BBC Radio and UK's BRMB as well as having TV shows for Channel 4 and the BBC. For more information please contact Steve on 0845 644 3001, by email at steve@steveerrey.com or visit his website at www.steveerrey.com

THE SECRET TO CONFIDENCE IS PREPARATION

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There can be no great courage when there is no confidence or assurance. Half the battle is in the conviction that you can accomplish what you undertake.

With practice you'll come to a point of competence in anything. You'll find yourself accomplishing your goals with grace and confidence.

It's then that you'll do things that you never dreamed you could do. You'll discover powers you never knew existed.

Confidence doesn't come out of nowhere. It's the result of constant work and dedication. When you're prepared, you're able to feel confident.

©2005 by Max Steingart

Color Yourself Well

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Spring Colors

Spring is about color. The season spreads a visual feast before us in every shade and hue of all the colors in the rainbow. Color is healing. Different colors have different healing properties, but all colors have the ability to make us feel better. We respond to color on an emotional level and spiritual level. Spring colors call us to renew and replenish our souls. In the fresh light of spring, colors are illuminated, greens are iridescent, reds burn, pinks blush, and yellows glow. Even the blue of the sky appears brighter.

Green, the first color to break through the winter gray, is the color of healing. It shows itself to be about growth and renewal in the tiny, bright green shoots that break through at the first inkling of spring. Even before the season's pink blossoms appear, green paves the way with buds and leaves in every shade from chartreuse to turquoise. Fields of soft, green grass call us to lie down and connect to the earth. We fall easily into peaceful rest, even sleep embraced in a sea of green. It balances our emotions and brings a feeling of calmness.

We draw energy from the reds of Iceland poppies, geraniums, fuchsia, roses, and so many more flowers that the season blesses us with. Red is the color of vitality and power. On the other hand, blue cools and calms our senses. A deep blue mountain lake speaks of truth, serenity, and harmony. A field of bright orange California poppies evokes gentle feelings of warmth for orange is a color used to increase immunity. Lavender elevates our spirituality in color as well as scent. Likewise gazing on a purple sunset inspires our soul, giving us clarity and enhanced intuition. A dandelion may be just a weed to some, but its sunny yellow flower can clear a foggy head. Yellow is the color of intellect and mental stimulation.

Spring has so many colors and the combinations in sunrises, meadows, oceans, and our own gardens awaken our senses. Colors offer a beautiful visual healing. We may vary individually in our response, but we do respond.

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The Trouble Tree

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- Author unknown

The carpenter I hired to help me restore an old farmhouse had just finished a rough first day on the job. A flat tire made him lose an hour of work, his electric saw quit, and now his ancient pickup truck refused to start.

While I drove him home, he sat in stony silence. On arriving, he invited me in to meet his family. As we walked toward the front door, he paused briefly at a small tree, touching tips of the branches with both hands. When opening the door, he underwent an amazing transformation. His tanned face was wreathed in smiles and he hugged his two small children and gave his wife a kiss.

Afterward he walked me to the car. We passed the tree and my curiosity got the better of me. I asked him about what I had seen him do earlier. Oh, that's my trouble tree," he replied. "I know I can't help having troubles on the job, but one thing's for sure, troubles don't belong in the house with my wife and the children. So I just hang them up on the tree every night when I come home. Then in the morning I pick them up again."

"Funny thing is," he smiled, "when I come out in the morning to pick 'em up, there ain't nearly as many as I remember hanging up the night before."

- Author unknown

DESIRE IS THE STARTING POINT FOR SUCCESS

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If you have the desire you have the power to be successful. You can really have anything you want in life if you go after it. But you have to want it.

The first thing that will contribute to reaching your goal is that you simply want to reach it badly enough. You must learn how to desire with sufficient intensity to be successful.

As a drowning soul desires air, as a shipwrecked person craves fresh water, so must you feel that intense, eager, insistent, demanding, ravenous desire for your success.

Your desire for success must be so strong within you that it becomes the very breath of your life. It must be your first thought when you wake up, and your last thought when you go to bed at night.

You can have anything you want if you go after it with intensity.

©2005 by Max Steingart

10 Steps To Better Decision Making

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Considering The Possibilities

1. Making a difficult choice can seem harrowing when you feel you're working alone. Involve others in your decision making by asking for criticism and seeking advice from those who can approach the choice from a fresh perspective. Listen to opinions that fall on both sides of the topic at hand. You may also want to consult an expert.

2. Learn from your mistakes as well as your triumphs. Examine decisions you have made in the past as they will teach you more than you will learn from most other sources. Though some decisions will not seem important, all decisions shape our lives and should be regarded as educational. Apply that knowledge to your current dilemma.

3. A good decision acted upon in a timely matter is always better than a great one acted upon too late. It is important to recognize that you will never know enough to make the perfect decision. Don't become paralyzed by your need to foresee all possible outcomes to every possible choice.

4. Involve your head and your heart. Ask both practical questions and personal questions about the problem at hand. Considering the facts as well as your feelings (and the feelings of others) when examining your options will ensure that you make a balanced decision.

5. Before anything else, focus on the most basic, necessary results. Often, a decision maker will get bogged down thinking about the non-essential elements of a decision. Avoid considering extraneous factors and far-fetched perfect outcomes. Ask yourself, "What needs to be done?"

6. Consider the entire range of possibilities, no matter how unlikely. When faced with a complex decision, brainstorm by yourself or with others to find as many of the vital elements as possible. Evaluate those elements as they relate to the choice you must make.

7. It was a wise person who noted that, "you can't please all of the people all of the time." Almost all decisions will involve some dissatisfaction or conflict. Some decisions may even create new problems. Once you have made a decision, stand by it. Keep in mind that you have used your best judgment and it was the best choice at the time.

8. Don't waste time on poor choices. Reject poor choices, even if you've begun to implement them, and stop doing the things that aren't working, so you can focus on the solutions that have strong potential.

9. Consult with the people who will be directly affected by your decision. People appreciate being heard and enjoy when their opinions are seen as valuable. Even making a simple choice can have a profound impact on those around you.

10. It is easy to dismiss your intuition, but in doing so, you may be disregarding valuable insight and even solutions. Ask yourself what choices you would make if you weren't afraid and then see what your subconscious offers as an answer. Try to ignore the fear of error when consulting your "gut."

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The smile epidemic

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- Bruno Gideon

When we smile to ourselves, even while talking on the phone, our energy changes. Our voice becomes friendlier and our mood becomes more positive. Sometimes it takes an effort to smile, but it is well worth it – not only for us but also for others, whether they can see us or not.

A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.
– Phyllis Diller

Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been.
– Mark Twain

The happiest people seem to be those who have no particular reason for being happy except that they are so.
– W.R. Inge

Smiling is infectious but causes ease rather than disease. Once you have caught it, it quickly spreads to others, putting everyone in a positive mood. I challenge you to try the smile experiment. The next time you meet a person with a grumpy expression, smile. When you’re walking, jogging, or lifting weights, smile. When you’re talking on the phone, smile. You’ll see: you will cause an epidemic of smiling.

Right now, do you have a smile on your face?

- Bruno Gideon

EVERYTHING IS POSSIBLE IF YOU BELIEVE

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There are no real barriers to your success. You must simply overcome any doubts you have about your ability. Your self image prescribes the limits for your accomplishments. It prescribes the area of what is possible for you.

Don't be afraid of living. If you believe that life is worth living you will create that fact around you. If you see yourself as prosperous, you will be. If you see yourself as broke, that's exactly what you will be.

You will never succeed until you believe you can succeed.

©2005 by Max Steingart

Inner Healing Wisdom

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Tuning Into Sickness

The physical body is like a biological computer. It is composed of innumerable components and stores many things in its vast memory. Though we try to rid ourselves of illnesses in the form of viruses, diseases, and aches and pains, these, too, are a part of the human computer. The mind-body system is miraculous, utilizing everything in its control to send us signs. Chronic pain can be a sign of discord, infection a sign of exhaustion or emotional repression, and a sour stomach a sign of anger or stress. Many illnesses are manifest into being through our own actions or inactions, bottled-up worries, or inability to feel deserving. Because your body will not lie to you, it is often possible to not only become well, but to treat the underlying root of the illness, by tuning into it. Essentially, it is another part of your body and, as such, can be communicated with.

If all people were to live lovingly, positively, and naturally, there would no doubt be less sickness. But, in this age of heavy workloads, complicated interpersonal communications, indoor activities, and pollution, the body begs to be consulted when illness strikes. When you feel sickness coming on or if you have been dealing with sickness for a long period of time, take time out of your day to sit quietly and relax deeply. When you have reached a state of intense relaxation, ask that which plagues you (be it virus, bacteria, or pain) what it wants. Talk to it as if it was an entity within you and have a conversation with it. But it is important to listen after you have posed your question; your body has all of the answers. If nothing is immediately forthcoming, ruminate on your life as of late. Are you avoiding a stressful situation or unconsciously seeking sympathy? That could be the case, but the answer you receive may not necessarily be profound, and it can be specific or somewhat vague. What your sickness tells you may be surprising. However, when you have acknowledged and accepted the answer, your recovery will be swift.

Tuning into your illness can help you learn new, more effective, adaptive, and powerful ways of dealing with sickness. Putting one's faith in the ability of the mind to heal the body and vice versa is an important step on the journey toward lasting self healing.


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The Wooden Bowl

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- Author Unknown

A frail old man went to live with his son, daughter-in-law, and a four-year old grandson. The old man's hands trembled, his eyesight was blurred, and his step faltered. The family ate together nightly at the dinner table. But the elderly grandfather's shaky hands and failing sight made eating rather difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon onto the floor. When he grasped the glass often milk spilled on the tablecloth. The son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess. "We must do something about grandfather," said the son. I've had enough of his spilled milk, noisy eating, and food on the floor. So the husband and wife set a small table in the corner. There, grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed dinner at the dinner table. Since grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in a wooden bowl. Sometimes when the family glanced in grandfather's direction, he had a tear in his eye as he ate alone. Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he dropped a fork or spilled food. The four-year-old watched it all in silence.

One evening before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor. He asked the child sweetly, "What are you making?" Just as sweetly, the boy responded, "Oh, I am making a little bowl for you and mama to eat your food from when I grow up." The four-year-old smiled and went back to work. The words so struck the parents that they were speechless. Then tears started to stream down their cheeks. Though no word was spoken, both knew what must be done. That evening the husband took grandfather's hand and gently led him back to the family table.

For the remainder of his days he ate every meal with the family. And for some reason, neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk spilled, or the tablecloth soiled. Children are remarkably perceptive. Their eyes ever observe, their ears ever listen, and their minds ever process the messages they absorb. If they see us patiently provide a happy home atmosphere for family members, they will imitate that attitude for the rest of their lives. The wise parent realizes that every day that building blocks are being laid for the child's future.

Let us all be wise builders and role models. Take care of yourself, ... and those you love, ... today, and everyday!

- Author Unknown

YOUR ASPIRATIONS ARE YOUR POSSIBILITIES

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The first ingredient of your success is to dream a great dream. You must dream big and think big to be big.

You're as small as your controlling desires, or as great as your dominant aspirations. Once your mind stretches to a new idea it will never go back to its original dimensions.

If you dream of little goals you can expect little achievement. If the goals you dream of are big ones, you'll win big success.

High expectation always precedes high achievement.

©2005 by Max Steingart

Carrying Protection

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Creating A Medicine Bag

Many cultures throughout history and in the present day have held the belief that holding objects of importance close to your heart is beneficial, even vital. Both the Native American people and the Australian aboriginals, as well as shamans in various cultures, have and still do create and carry medicine bags for luck, guidance, protection, and healing. Traditionally the bag, usually a beautifully decorated leather pouch, contained items like feathers, herbs, stones, ashes, salves, animal parts like teeth or bone, or mementos from special experiences. In creating your own medicine bag, let your own heart guide you as to the contents most meaningful to you.

Pick a bag that speaks to you, or make your own. Before you fill it, insert a square, rolled red cloth. It will be the mat that holds your bag's contents. If you decide to create a bag with more traditional items or items for ceremonial use, you might add sage, cedar, tobacco, and sweet grass, as well as a shell in which to let them smolder. A feather or a bit of loose fur can be valued additions, especially if they come from a type of animal sacred to you. A crystal you resonate with or a totem can help you stay balanced. Your medicine bag can also reflect your personality. You may want to choose items that will help improve your mood and focus, as well as giving you pleasant sensory experiences, like a pouch of sand from a beloved beach. Finally, ask yourself what items you use for healing. It is not inappropriate to add a modern touch, such as a photo, a lock of hair, or an affirming note.

Your medicine bag may be useful, filled with herbal remedies and healing items, or symbolic, and a means to keep treasured objects nearby. Add to it slowly and let your heart decide the contents if you're not sure what you want your medicine bag to contain. Place your finished bag on your altar if you have one, or in a special place in your home. Some people carry their medicine bag with them always, but do what feels right for you. Trust in the process of inner creation in the manner of the Native American medicine people and you won't go wrong.

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Your Agreements Show Your Integrity

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– By Michael Angier

Except for disease and climatic disasters, I believe that over 90 percent of the world’s problems result from people not keeping their agreements.

Think about it. From countries to corporations to families and friends, most every upset--little or large--can be traced back to someone not keeping up their end of the bargain.

Wars break out, companies fail, marriages end, friendships fracture and deals fall through simply because of broken agreements.

We all make agreements every day. Some seem small and insignificant: an agreed upon time to meet, a promise to run an errand. Others are seen as bigger and more important: a formal contract, signing a loan agreement.

But all of them are important. Because this is the way trust is earned. A person’s reputation is built upon their ability to make and keep agreements.

Your life--and the lives of those around you--will work better when agreements are carefully made and diligently kept. The quality of your life is in direct relation to the quality of your agreements. Here are seven tips to help you become and remain a person who can be counted upon:

1. Take All Agreements Seriously

When you agree to do something--do it. And do it when you said you would in the way you agreed to do it. When you agree to meet someone, be sure to be there and be on time. Agreements with yourself matter, too. If you promise yourself that you’ll exercise today, keep your promise. Develop the HABIT of keeping your agreements.

2. Be Careful What You Agree To

Don’t give your word lightly. Many people find it easier to say yes instead of no. But it’s far better to be a bit guarded with what we agree to do because we can find ourselves getting over-committed and then unable to complete what we said we would.

3. Keep Track of Your Agreements

In the course of a week we might enter into dozens of agreements. We must have some way to track these promises--a follow-up system to keep yourself--and those you deal with--on top of what was promised. Write them down. You may have great intentions, but if you forget to do what you agreed to do, the result is the same as you CHOOSING not to keep your agreement.

4. Make Sure Your Agreements Are Clear

With a written agreement you have a prayer. With a verbal agreement you’ve got nothing but air. It’s always best to have a written agreement--even if it’s just a letter or note of understanding. It’s much easier to iron out any confusion later if it was written down and no one has to rely on the memory of a conversation.

5. Be Careful With Whom You Make Agreements

There’s an old adage, "Cheat me once, shame on you; cheat me twice, shame on me." If you make agreements with people who have a history of not keeping them, you’re leaving yourself wide open for disappointment.

6. Renegotiate When You’re Unable to Keep Your Agreement

When you find yourself unable or unwilling to complete an agreement, always go to the other party or parties and renegotiate. It may be uncomfortable but it will keep you in integrity and has far more class than simply not addressing the issue.

7. Manage By Agreement

Instead of just telling someone to do something, ask them if they would agree to doing thus and so by such and such time. If I tell someone to do something, they might do it because they were told to do so, but if I ask them and gain their agreement, I’ve got a lot better chance that it’ll get done. In using this method, you also find out if your request was clearly understood.

By paying careful attention to the agreements we make, tracking them and developing the habit of keeping all our agreements we become and remain a person of integrity.

Our lives and the world around us work in direct proportion to the quality of our agreements.

About the Author:

Copyright 2002 Michael Angier & Success Networks. Part of Success Net's mission is to position you for greater success. Free subscriptions, memberships, eCourses, eBooks and SuccessMark Cards are available at http://www.selfgrowth.com/products/MichaelAngier.html -- InfoPlease@SuccessNet.org

WHAT YOU SEE IS WHAT YOU GET

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Life at any time can become difficult. Life at any time can become easy. It all depends upon how you adjust yourself to life. You cannot always control your circumstances. But you can always think positive thoughts.

The realities of life result from many outside factors, none of which you can control. Your attitude, however, reflects the way in which you evaluate what's happening to you.

It is not your situation, it's your reaction to the situation that's important. Things always seem to turn out best for those people who can make the best out of the way things turn out.

There is nothing either good or bad, only your thinking makes it so.

©2005 by Max Steingart

Mystery Of Transformation

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The Butterfly Chrysalis

During the time that a caterpillar egg is an egg, it looks nothing like a caterpillar, and the butterfly seems a far cry from the larva that precedes it. Do caterpillars recognize butterflies as their future selves? Do butterflies identify caterpillars as past relations? The most mysterious phase of this shape-shifting creature's process is the chrysalis, the jade green cocoon in which the crawling, leaf-eating caterpillar transforms into a floating, nectar-drinking butterfly.

In our human lives, we sometimes find ourselves in the chrysalis state. During those times we don't have much to offer the outside world because, whether we realize it or not, much of our energy is consumed with an inner transition. We might feel sluggish or disinterested in the outside world. We might feel impatient with ourselves, wondering why we don't have the energy we used to for our usual routines. But if we remember the chrysalis-the dark, inner sanctum that provides the environment for a remarkable conversion-we can relax and let ourselves be, finding ways to support our process rather than cajoling ourselves out of it.

If you see a butterfly emerging from its chrysalis, the temptation may be to help it break out. But the physical challenge of this part of the process is necessary for the butterfly to build its strength so that it can survive outside the chrysalis. The same is true of us. Sometimes we have to labor on our own to discover the force we need to be our new selves in the world. Similarly, when seeing friends or family members struggling, it's easy to become impatient and want to help with their emergence, but we have to learn to let others make their own way. Taking on the challenge of liberating ourselves directly enables us to thrive in our new freedom. Sometimes the greatest supports we can offer others and ourselves are patience and quiet confidence in the process unfolding, along with faith that the result will be extraordinary.

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Stepping stones to success

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- By Bruno Gideon

Try this little experiment. Think of an obstacle that lies in your path. Next, imagine that you won’t have to deal with it for five years. The obstacle immediately takes on a less threatening demeanor, doesn’t it? Now think back five years. Can you even remember the obstacles that you were facing at the time?

Press on. Obstacles are seldom the same size tomorrow,
as they are today.
– Robert H. Schuller

If you find a path with no obstacles, it probably doesn't lead anywhere.
– Frank A. Clark

Stand up to your obstacles and do something about them.
You will find that they haven't half the strength you think they have.
– Norman Vincent Peale

If an obstacle lies in your path and you are able to see it for what it really is, you have already won. It’s as simple as that. Obstacles have only one purpose: to give us an opportunity to learn and then move on to the next one with greater wisdom. Of course, the question is how to see obstacles for what they really are. I have found that the trick is to slow yourself down. Don’t react right away. Sometimes a few deep breaths will suffice. Sometimes you may need to sleep on it or give it a few days’ reflection. Whatever the case, slowing down allows you to establish distance and that will allow the magic to happen – the magic in which obstacles become stepping stones to success.

Has something unpleasant just happened to you? Establish some distance and watch what happens.

- Bruno Gideon

WHEN YOU BELIEVE YOU CAN, YOU CAN

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If you want to be successful, start thinking of yourself as being successful. You are what you believe yourself to be.

Don't be afraid of what life has to offer you. If you believe that life is worth living, your belief will help create the fact.

The barrier between you and success is not something that exists in the real world. It's simply composed of doubts about your ability. Your only limits to your realization of tomorrow will be your doubts of today.

Success is a state of mind.

©2005 by Max Steingart

Self As Sanctuary

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Being Always At Home

It is natural to become attached to the people, places, and things in our lives that provide us with a sense of consistency and stability, but it is important to remember that no matter how reliable they are for a time, they are subject, as all things are, to the law of impermanence. As the world around us changes, one thing we can always count on is our relationship with ourselves.

This may seem obvious, but we often forget to turn to ourselves when we need support and love, looking instead to outside sources. We can feel disappointed when we don't get what we need from the people in our lives. While receiving love and support from outside ourselves is valuable, it is also vital to remember that we carry within us an unlimited source of love and support. We can always turn within and find what we need, taking our rightful seat in the sanctuary of our Selves.

Not everyone has easy access to this inner haven, but have no doubt that it is there. It is often necessary to spend time alone in order to find it. Make a conscious effort to take time to explore your inner space. Even if only for five minutes a day, close your eyes and breathe deeply, tuning into your inner being. Greet yourself as a trusted friend and relax into the experience of just being there. The more time you spend in this space, the more you will understand and trust yourself.

Affirmations can also help return you to the strength and support within. Remind yourself: No matter what happens, I will always love and support myself. No matter who rejects me, I will always be here for myself. I am the source of my own safety and abundance. As you say these powerful words, you will see their truth, and you will know, beyond the shadow of a doubt, that you are the most reliable friend and the safest haven you could ever want.


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Get Up and Get Over It!

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– By Larry W. Robinson

Ok. So life has thrown you a curve ball. You have fallen and your feel like you can’t get up. You lost your job, your money and your honey. What do you do? My advice is: "Get up and Get Over it!" Yes, you read right. Let me say it again, "Get up and Get Over it!" When will you realize stuff happens to the best of us? It is just a part of the seasons of life. Some things have to die to be reborn into a better, more beautiful and useful creation.

After reading “How I Retired at 26!”, I put down the book and called the author Asha Tyson. I was moved by her triumph to what many would call a true “Rags to Riches” story. I strongly encourage you to get her book and find out how she turn a “set back” in to an incredible “come back”. During our conversation, I shared with Asha how I was developing an article called "Get up and Get Over it!" Her excitement nearly blew me away! She said, “Larry it is necessary!” I agree. It is necessary that you do not wallow in the tragedies and disappointments of life. You must "Get up and Get Over it!" You must talk to yourself and tell yourself that this situation is just a pause in one paragraph of the pages of my life. Notice I described it as a situation. That is all it is, a situation that needs a strategy to solve it. You must step back and see it for that it really is!

My friends and I have this little comment we make when things don’t go our way and one of us starts to complain. We tell each other, “You will get over it, and this too shall pass.” Then we all have a big laugh. We laugh because we remind ourselves how we each faced difficult situations in the pass. But someway, somehow, either through pain or desperation, a strategy was formed and we moved onward and upward. That is what I encourage you to do. Develop a strategy so that you too can move onward and upward. You must plan, pursue, and persist.

I asked Asha what was her strategy for getting through setbacks. The following was her formula:

1. Renew your mind!

(I agree with her. Obviously something you are currently doing is not working or needs to reviewed and revamped. Quickly make the necessary adjustment and move on.)

2. Recapture your Passion!

(Asha is right on it. Everyone one of us as Asha puts it, “come knowing what we love,” but somehow doing the course of our life we forget or are deprogrammed by the influences of life. Remember what you use to love and then take that memory with you into the future. Many times we remember what we once loved and think it can’t be pursued. This is simply not true. You can and you must do it or you will take to your grave an awesome gift that could have been developed and employed.)

3. Get your life in order!

(I wish I were in the same room with Asha so I could give her a high-five on this one. In order to "Get up and Get Over it!" you must get your life in order. There is a certain order to a well-developed and successful life. Start with the small things like straighten out the things in your immediate reach. Clean your room, office or car. When things are out of order your mind is out of order. A mind out of order creates a life out of order. Get in order!)

4. Learn Money!

(Contrary to popular belief, money is NOT evil! People with money are NOT evil. But the LOVE of money is evil. Learn to see money as a tool. Learn to live beneath your means. Learn to save 10%, invest 10% and give 10% of your money away to worthy causes. Then and only then will money be continuously attracted back to you.)

5. Continue to Grow.

(In order for anything to stay alive it must continue to grow. Once it becomes stagnant it will die. You must continue to grow, expand and increase your knowledge. Read the books, listen to the tapes and sermons, and attend the seminars. Never stop learning. My grandmother used to tell me, “Wear out, don’t Rust out!”)

I once read, “Life is God’s gift to you, what you do with your life is your gift to God.” So what will you do with your life? No matter what stage of life you are in now, you can press onward and upward. “You will get over it, and yes this too shall pass!” You owe it to yourself and the generations that will follow to: "Get up and Get Over it!" Near the end of my conversation with Asha Tyson, she said something that really impacted me: “To ‘Get up and Get Over it!’ is the best favor you can give to yourself!” I totally agree. Now will you "Get up and Get Over it?"

Safe and Secure,

- Larry W. Robinson

About the Author:

Larry’s mission in life is to share with others simple, yet effective strategies to live a balanced and abundant life. When you are tired of guessing how to do it, visit his web site or contact him to get clear, purposeful answers! If I were you, I would contact him TODAY!!!
http://www.larrywrobinson.com

RICHES LIE WITHIN YOU, NOT IN YOUR MATERIAL POSSESSIONS

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Wealth without enjoyment is little consolation. Your real riches in life are riches of the head and heart. Satisfaction comes when you appreciate what you have.

While success is getting what you want, true happiness is wanting what you get.

It's not how much you have, but how much you enjoy that truly matters.

©2005 by Max Steingart

Conscious Inspiration

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Being Creative Everyday

Many people harbor the idea that there are two kinds of people in the world: creative and non-creative. You often hear certain people saying, "I wish I were creative." Actually, we are all inherently creative. As human beings, creativity is our birthright. We use it to get through each and every day, in simple tasks like picking out what to wear or choosing the words we use to express ourselves. Not only is it natural for us to be creative, it is also healthy. Experts say that conscious creativity is as good for our overall sense of wellbeing as exercising, eating well, and getting enough sleep.

When we are "in the zone" with our creativity, we move into a different experience of time and space; hours pass like minutes and we sometimes literally forget where we are. Our logical mind, which generally runs the show, takes a backseat to imagination and intuition, creating a feeling of spaciousness, calm and release. When we return to the grid of everyday reality, we see with new eyes.

We can easily access our creativity throughout the day, with simple exercises. At work, take a moment to rearrange the objects on your desk or wall, maybe replacing old photographs or objects with new images that inspire new thoughts. Just five minutes devoted to this simple creative act can noticeably refresh your mind. To elevate your entire day into a more creative zone, take your camera with you and use it to document one full day in your life. The benefits of creativity are in the doing. The finished product, while it can be wonderful, is almost beside the point. What matters most is the experience of being awake and relaxed in the flow of our lives.

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