Friday, December 30, 2005

Reversed Perceptions

-------------------------------------------------
Projecting

We all have issues, as well as undesirable qualities or traits that we don't like about ourselves. Most of us realize that we are not perfect and that it is natural to have unpleasant thoughts, motivations, desires, or feelings. However, when a person does not acknowledge these, they may ascribe those characteristics to someone else, deeming other people instead as angry, jealous, or insecure. In psychological terms, such blaming and fault finding is called projection.

When we are the target of projections, it can be confusing and frustrating, not to mention maddening, particularly when we know that we are not the cause of another person's distress. Even people who are well aware of their issues may find that sensitive subjects can bring up unexpected projections. They may feel insecure about a lack of funds and thus view a friend as extravagant. Or, if they really want to get in shape, they may preach the benefits of exercise to anyone and everyone.

While we can try to avoid people we know who engage in projecting their "stuff" onto others, we can't always steer clear of such encounters. We can, however, deflect some projections through mindfulness and meditation. A useful visualization tool is to imagine wrapping ourselves in a protective light everyday. At other times, we may have to put up a protective shield when we feel a projection coming our way, reminding ourselves that someone else's issues are not ours. Although it's difficult not to react when we are the recipient of a projection, it is a good idea to try to remain calm and let the other person know if they are being unreasonable and disrespectful. We all know that it's not fun to be dumped on. Likewise, we should be mindful that we don't take our own frustrations out on others. When we take ownership of our thoughts, motivations, desires, and feelings, we are less likely to project our issues or disowned qualities onto others.

What do you think?

Panic Attacks, Depression Harm Your Mind and Body

-------------------------------------------------
– By Dr. Joseph Mercola

A study examined the medical histories of nearly 40,000 people who were diagnosed as suffering from panic disorder.

It found that those who suffer from panic disorder are at almost double the risk for coronary heart disease, and those who suffer from depression as well are at nearly three times the risk.

Panic disorder is a syndrome characterized by repeated episodes of intense fear. These episodes are accompanied by physical symptoms, which can include chest pain, heart palpitations, shortness of breath, dizziness, and abdominal distress. Roughly 2.4 million Americans experience panic attacks each year.

The way in which coronary heart disease is triggered by panic attacks is unknown. However, some stress responses to depression already have been shown to increase the risk of coronary heart disease.

Science Blog, September 22, 2005

Dr. Mercola's Comment:

This should comes as no surprise considering what a major role negative emotions play in your body's healing process. The connection between your mind and your body is strong and well-documented by a literal mountain of scientific research; healing your mind is a crucial step in keeping your body healthy.

Unfortunately, most doctors, when faced with a patient who suffers from panic disorder or depression, will reflexively resort to prescribing potentially toxic medications as a förm of treatment, even though they don't provide any meaningful benefit. This is largely related to the incredibly effective "brain washing" influence that the drug companies have over their educational intervention.

How can I make such a bold statement?

Easy. I was one of the brain-washed doctors. I went into medical school fully believing in the power of your body to heal naturally, and I came out a drug-prescribing doctor. I think I must have had but several thousand patients on antidepressants in the first few years of my practice alone. Seemed like every other patient was walking out the door with a scrïpt for Prozac or Wellbutrin.

But fortunately I finally woke up one day and began to understand that there were far more effective options that actually addressed the underlying cause of the disease.

One of my absolute favorite treatments that can make all the difference to your health and help you deal with panic attacks or depression is the Emotional Freedom Technique, the energy psychology tool I use daily in my practice. It is particularly effective for panic attacks.

Another wonderful tool you can use is meditation. Some people use it to promote spiritual growth or find inner peace, while others use it as a relaxation and stress-reduction tool.

Panic and anxiety disorders can be debilitating and severely affect your ability to perform everyday tasks. They can also, in addition, put you at risk for a variety of physical health problems. Resolve your emotional stresses, and both your mind and your body will experience the benefits.

Another excellent meditation tool is the Insight CD, which I nöw recommend to many of my patients. The Insight CD is a complete tool dedicated to helping you reduce stress, explore expanded states of consciousness, and achieve deeper levels of self-awareness.

About the Author:

This article is reprinted from Mercola.com, the world's number-1 most visited and trusted natural/alternative health website. For a limited-time only, you can take the FRËE "Metabolic Type Test" to help you learn the right foods for your particular body type so you can achieve optimal fitness and health. Just go to http://www.mercola.com/forms/mt_test.htm right nöw to take this quick test!

IT TAKES PERSISTENCE TO REACH A GOAL

------------------------------------------------

'Keep trying' is the rule that must be followed to be successful at anything.

Your success will always be connected with your actions. Just keep moving towards your goal. You'll make mistakes but don't ever quit. You may even have to hang on after others have let go.

Persistence means taking pains to overcome every obstacle, to do all that's necessary to reach your goal.

In the end, the only people who fail are those that do not try. All great achievement takes time.


©2005 by Max Steingart

Thursday, December 29, 2005

A Gift Of The Heart

-------------------------------------------------
Letting People Know You Love Them

It's easy to take our feelings for granted and to assume that the people we care about know how we feel about them. But while those we love are often quite cognizant of our feelings, saying "I love you" is a gift we should give to our loved ones whenever we can. Letting people know you love them is an important part of nurturing any kind of loving relationship. Few people tire of being told they are loved, and saying "I love you" can make a world of difference in someone's life, take a relationship to a new level, or reaffirm and strengthen a steady bond. Everyone needs to hear the words "I love you." Three simple words - I - Love - You. When you declare your love for someone you admit to them that you care for them in the most significant way.

It can be difficult to express your love using words, particularly if you grew up around people that never expressed their affection verbally. But you should never be afraid to say "I love you" or worry that doing so will thrust you into a position of excessive vulnerability. It is important to share your feelings with those that matter to you. Part of the fulfillment that comes with loving someone is telling them that you love them. Besides, love exists to be expressed, not withheld.

If you love someone, let them know. Don't be afraid of the strength of your emotions or worry that your loved one won't feel the same way. Besides, the words "I love you" are often best said to another without expectation of a return investment. As each one of us is filled with an abundance of love, there is never any worry that you'll run out of love if your expression of love isn't said back to you. Saying "I love you" is a gift of the heart sent directly via words to the heart of a recipient. Even though it may not always look that way, love from the heart is an offering that is always unconditional and given without strings attached. That is the true essence of the gift of "I love you.

What do you think?

Are You a 'Yes-Dog'?

---------------------------------------------------
– By Suzanne Falter-Barns

There was once a time (and there still is, to a certain degree) when I would say 'Yes' to every opportunïty, request, suggestion, good idea, and even mediocre idea that came my way. And let me tell you, it was exhausting.

It was like I had this automatic, knee-jerk reaction to accommodate any suggestion that came my way -- as if it were my karmic duty. I call this auto-response being a 'yes-dog'. Perhaps you know the feeling.

When you're a yes-dog, your entire being is all about making other people happy; you knock yourself out doing it. No task is too small -- you figure you've always got room in your psyche, your schedule or your soul to squeeze in one more thing that someone wants to fit in. God forbid you should say no... for then that someone would be unhappy. Which would be unthinkable.

Like a lot of creative people, I'm naturally empathetic -- so I could literally feel other people's pain... an experience I simply wanted to avoid as much as possible. For many years, I thought it was up to me to please the rest of the world. I literally thought it was my job to be a 'yes-dog'.

These days, I'm taking a much more circumspect view. I've come to the realization that I simply can't live my soul purpose AND make the rest of the world happy all the time.

And I realize that being a yes-dog doesn't always make the rest of the world happy - even in my little corner. The more well known I get, and the wider my reach, the more I can see it. There is always someone, somewhere, who has a problem with what I'm doing. And therein lay the breakthrough.

I'm no longer uncomfortable with other people's pain. I mean, it's not like I relish it; but I don't run to avoid it. I've come to realize we all have a path and a learning process we're going through. This means my entire job is nothing more than to be authentic, listen to my gut, and act accordingly. Not only will I not make everyone happy... I can't!

If someone is upset by this, it's no longer a big problem. Rather, it's simply the way their path is rubbing up against my path; it's part of life, growth, and karma. So I have nothing to fear.

My friend Joan Sotkin has a saying, "I don't always have to be the one who's uncomfortable here." Amen! Since I've given up being a yes-dog, and let go of the need to be 'the one who's always uncomfortable', great things have begun to stream my way. My reach, my income, my productivity and my impact in the world have gone up in quantum leaps.

Best of all, I've relaxed as I go about my business. 'No' is not scary -- it's empowering. And ironically enough, the world has not turned on me in anger and resentment... it's actually stepped right up to my door and truly embraced what I'm doing.

Are you a yes-dog? Take my handy quiz below to assess where you are. And may I suggest a step away from that easy little word, to one that can be equally empowering: "No."

The Are You a 'Yes-Dog'? Questionnaire:

1. Do you find it hard to say no to your children, even when they're making unreasonable demands?

a) Always
b) Occasionally
c) Rarely
d) Nevër

2. Do you long to be able to tell your boss exactly what you think... but you just can't?

a) Always
b) Occasionally
c) Rarely
d) Nevër

3. Do you find it impossible to deny yourself 'forbidden' pleasures' - i.e. Ben & Jerry's ice cream - when you're dieting, even if you've made a decision not to indulge?

a) Always
b) Occasionally
c) Rarely
d) Nevër

4. Do your friends tell you that you're a pushover and advise you to stand firm?

a) Always
b) Occasionally
c) Rarely
d) Nevër

5. Do you get a queasy feeling in your gut when someone asks you to do something that's just not a good fit for you... and then inevitably cave in despite your feelings?

a) Always
b) Occasionally
c) Rarely
d) Nevër

6. Are you uncomfortable asking for more monëy or more responsibility around your work?

a) Always
b) Occasionally
c) Rarely
d) Nevër

7. Are you always the person who volunteers even when you don't want to?

a) Always
b) Occasionally
c) Rarely
d) Nevër

8. Are there things you long to do in life, but you simply can't find the time or the courage to get to them?

a) Always
b) Occasionally
c) Rarely
d) Nevër

Rate your answers:

For every a) give yourself 10 points. For every b) give yourself 7 points.

For every c) give yourself 4 points. For every d) give yourself 1 point.

If your score is 60-80, you're probably saying 'Yes' WAY more often than you want to. Consider getting some coaching on how to say no from a good friend, life coach, or partner.

If your score is 40-60, your ability to say 'No' willingly is spotty... try pausing and counting silently to five before you answer.

If your score is 20-40, you've got most situations pretty well in hand. Try saying 'No' just a little more often and see what happens.

If your score is 0-20, you're doing great! Your ability to monitor when to say 'Yes' and when to say 'No' is truly inspiring.

About the Author:

For information on how to find the time, energy, and monëy to live your purpose in life, chëck out Suzanne's frëe ezine, The Joy Letter. Sign up at http://www.howmuchjoy.com/joyletter.html and receive her valuable report, 35 Guaranteed Time Savers. And get a daily blast of joyful tips from the Blast o' Joy blog at http://selfhelpsalon.typepad.com/blast_o_joy/

YOU ARE WHAT YOU THINK

------------------------------------------------

Your inner thoughts can cause you to be rich or poor, loved or unloved, happy or unhappy, attractive or unattractive, powerful or weak.

What you impress upon your mind, you'll inevitably become. It's a psychological law that whatever you desire to accomplish you must first impress upon your subconscious mind.

Relentless, repetitive self talk will change your self image. You'll affect your subconscious mind with verbal repetition. Constant repetition carries conviction.

When you change your values you'll change your behavior. Start thinking of yourself as becoming the person you want to be. Self suggestion will make you the master of yourself.

You can become whatever you want to be. If you believe you can, you can.


©2005 by Max Steingart

Wednesday, December 28, 2005

Creative Cuts

------------------------------------------------
Editing Your Life

Our lives can be compared to an ongoing movie script over which we have complete creative control. Within us lies the power to examine what works or isn't working in our lives and make "edits" to our life's script, accordingly. Choosing to actively edit your life can be incredibly empowering. As you evolve, you have the choice to accept the script you've written thus far or edit it so you can create a life that fulfills you. You can cut out from your life's script what is no longer working for you. Acknowledging that you are responsible for the experience you create gives you the ability to create the life you've always longed for.

Granted, editing your real life isn't always as easy as erasing a line of text. If you've carried emotional baggage or held on to an unhealthy relationship for a long time, these may be difficult to edit out. But when you do cut out what isn't working from your life, you'll feel lighter and more alive. Editing out activities that you find stressful, disassociating yourself from people that drain your energy, and letting go of your emotional baggage are all beneficial cuts you can make. In the empty spaces that are left behind, you can add in anything you like. Just as you have the power to edit out negative situations or beliefs that you no longer wish to have as part of your life, you can now include the kinds of positive experiences, people, and beliefs that you would like to fill your life with. The manifestation of these thoughts and images as realities in your life will inevitably follow. As you make changes to your life, you can also add in the bits where you choose more intimate, healthier relationships, seek out adventure over tedium, and are no longer negatively impacted by old experiences.

To begin editing your life, simply think about your positive and negative experiences. When you determine what parts of your life are no longer serving you, make the commitment to remove them - though, it is important to remember that there is no proper timing or way to do this, and patience and compassion for yourself are always important during this process. Then, ask yourself what has brought you profound bliss and consider how you can make those experiences and beliefs part of your life now. With a little editing, you'll be able to clear out what is no longer serving you and make room in your life for more happiness, love, and wisdom.

What do you think?

Goal Setting and Your Annual Life Review

------------------------------------------------
– By Wendy Betterini

If you've ever had a yearly performänce review for your job, you know it can be a tense experience that determines whether you receive a pay raise or not. Your boss will likely have a detailed checklist of your progress and success, as well as notations on areas that could use some improvement.

While these reviews can be stressful, they are also helpful because they offer a bïgger perspective than you would ordinarily see in your day-to-day job functions. You might become aware of activities that are unproductive, limiting, or even detrimental to your professional advancement.

You can also benefit from this same process by creating an annual New Year review for your life. It can help you assess progress in all areas of your life, address challenges and obstacles, and come up with some exciting goals and plans for the New Year.

The best time to do a review is during the last few weeks of the year, but it can be done any time you want a fresh start. You can choose to do just one session or several, whatever works best for you.

* Set the Mood

When you are ready to begin, first create a calm, quiet atmosphere. Put on comfortable clothing and choose a private area where you won't be disturbed for 30-60 minutes. You can also light some scented candles and incense, and play some soft music if you like. Grab a pen and notebook or journal. Then take a few minutes to sit quietly and take some slow, deep breaths. This will help you release stress and focus your thoughts.

* Review

Now you are ready to begin reviewing your life over the past year. Did you accomplish everything you wanted to? Were there areas that could have used some improvement? Give some thought to these six categories:

1) Physical health and fitness (diet, exercise)

2) Financial wellness (earnings, savings, investments)

3) Spiritual growth (inner peace, meditation, prayer)

4) Mental health (positive thoughts, attitude)

5) Career (job, business)

6) Relationships (with significant others, children, friends, family)

Ask yourself three questïons about each of these areas, and write your
answers in the journal.

1) Which of my positive actions contributed to growth and progress?

2) Which of my negative actions caused stagnation and lack of progress?

3) What could I do better to improve my progress in the coming year?

It is very important not to judge yourself harshly during this process! An annual review is not about beating yourself up or concluding that you're a terrible person. This should be an unemotional, objective view of your life goals and progress. By becoming aware of areas where you can take more control over your life, you can create more success and abundance.

* Plan

Now that you have a clear view of the past year and ideas about what you could do differently, you can make plans and set goals for the coming year. Again, look at the six main areas of your life: Physical health, Financial wellness, Spiritual growth, Mental health, Career, and Relationships. What would you like to create for yourself in the coming year? Write some specific goals for each category. Your goals should be realistic, yet somewhat challenging. You want to dream big, but not
overwhelm yourself either. It can also be helpful to break your bïgger goals down into smaller increments. You can set 3 month goals, 6 month goals, 9 month goals, and 12 month goals.

* Action Steps

This is a crucial step in the process. Once you have your goals set for each category, think about the action steps that will move you toward your goals. For example, if you want to losë weïght and get into better shape, daily exercise would be an action step. That is something you need to do every day (or nearly every day) in order to accomplish your goal. Be specific with the action goals. Don't just write, "Eat healthy." Write down exactly which foods you want to include, and which you want to avoid. Write down the exact types of exercise you want to include, which days of the week you want to do them, and for how many minutes each day.

* Enjoy the Journey

Once you begin putting your action steps into motion, it's important to understand that self-improvement is a process. You won't change everything overnight. By expecting too much, too soon, you could sabotage yourself. Instead, keep focusing on the action steps every day. Congratulate and praise yourself for keeping with it. If you begin to slack off, be firm with yourself about getting back on track, but again, don't beat yourself up. Simply refocus on your goals and begin again. All positive actions will create positive results, and as long as you keep trying, you cannot fail.

* Gauge Your Progress

It can be helpful to keep performing daily or weekly checks to be sure you are moving in the right direction. Simply review the goals and action steps you have set for yourself, and assess whether you are on track or not. Again, keep this process unemotional and objective. If you see areas that could use improvement, you already know the steps to take to turn them around again.

Activities like this review process can be such a powerful tool in our own development. No matter what we've achieved or haven't achieved in the past, it's nevër too late to start over. Each new day is a chance to invite more love, abundance, joy, peace, and success into our lives. Simply by focusing our thoughts and taking action toward our goals, we can create virtually anything we desire.

About the Author:

Wendy Betterini is a freelance writer who strives to motivate, uplift, and inspire you to make your dreams a reality. Visit her website http://www.WingsForTheHeart.com for more positive thoughts to help you on your journey.

YOU HAVE TO GIVE BEFORE YOU GET

-------------------------------------------------

It's a universal law: You have to give before you get. You must plant your seeds before you reap the harvest. The law works to give you back more than you have sown.

When you give to others, you'll find yourself blessed. The more you sow, the more you reap.

He who obtains has little. He who scatters has much.

Nature does not give to those who will not spend. You only get to keep what you give away.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

©2005 by Max Steingart




How would you like a positive attitude today? Get a daily dose of positivity with uplifting stories, motivational articles, and inspirational quotes. Please stop by and visit Daily Motivations: http://edancel.blogspot.com

Please Forward This Message To Someone Who
Needs A Little Motivation Today.


Take Care,

Eduardo Dancel
http://www.geocities.com/edancel

Create A Little Extra Income With Me:

Lucrative Global Business Opportunity with absolutely no cost to start. Click the following link for a video presentation: http://www.freedom.ws/edancel

Do you have your own Internet address yet? If not, you should check this out right away. I was blown away by what I saw and I'm sure you will be too. There's a good chance you can still get your name as your very own domain on the Internet. I've already got mine at http://EduardoDancel.ws. Not only that, it's also a great way to make extra money online no matter where you live on the planet earth. You see, Global Domains International has no boundaries. It's truly a great and one of a kind International business opportunity. See for yourself. Visit my web site today for details. http://EduardoDancel.ws

Need more information? Call 1-800-693-6897 or if International, 760-494-4355. Online video presentation: http://www.freedom.ws/edancel

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

Just For Fun

---------------------------------------------------
Remembering Childhood Joys

As adults, we often get so caught up in "grown up" business that we can forget how to have pure fun. This isn't the kind of fun that comes from doing a specific kind of activity or being in a specific mood for fun. Rather, this is the fun born from the state of pure being. You see this kind of fun in small children who are so busy being fully present to their lives and in their own bodies that the glow of fun radiates from them just because they are alive: the delight that flashes across the eyes of a child who discovers that water flows with the turn of the tap knob or the squeal of pleasure from a young baby whose tongue is being tickled by cold ice cream; then there's the full, infectious laughter of a child watching the same hat trick for the fiftieth time.

Back when we were children, this experience of pure delight didn't have to come from a heightened, heady event in order for us to feel like our day had been made; and it can be that way for us again - if we are willing to remember and reconnect with that part of ourselves that knows how to be in the flow of fun. You can begin this process by reminiscing on what was fun for you as a child. Think about what caused you to giggle in delight or wriggle in pleasure or burst into endless laughter that you couldn't sit up straight no matter how much you wanted to. Try to spend a few moments with each memory, and really feel what it was like to be in those experiences - allowing that feeling of pure fun to wash over you. It lives, in you - that feeling. It can't be bottled, manufactured, or sold. You just have to call it back up in order to experience it again.

Pure fun happens when we are fully engaged with ourselves and our world in each moment. It is the spontaneous delight that bubbles out of us when we let go long enough to bring it through; it is the experience of natural, organic pleasure that springs up from our bellies, through our souls, up through our faces, and down to our toes. We've naturally known how to have pure fun since we were babies and the flicker of lights caused us to jump to attention from the sheer enjoyment of being able to see. Approach your life today with the knowledge that pure fun isn't something that is given or done to you; rather, it is something that you allow yourself to experience.

What do you think?

How To Conquer Your Stressed Mind

------------------------------------------------
– By Christopher Green

In the 21st century, it is predicted that stress and stress related illnesses such as depression and anxiety will become the biggest killers. Despite significant advances in housing, standards of living, quality of food, and medical science, the pressures all of us have to face in today’s world are as demanding as any pressures experienced by our predecessors. Why are these illnesses on the rise?

Why do some people become so ill through these illnesses that they can find it hard to function? Well, they sure don’t happen overnight! You don’t suddenly wake up one morning and feel stressed or depressed. It’s not like flicking on a light switch! And by the same rule, if you’re suffering, you can’t just wake up one morning, flick off the switch and say “Great, I’m better nöw.” Many people who don’t suffer from these illnesses often say to sufferers: “Come on, snap out of it.” If only it were so easy! Should anyone say this to you, please forgive them as it’s just a lack of understanding.

It’s very hard for people to understand how you’re feeling if they haven’t been there. The fact that these illnesses don’t suddenly happen means we can draw some parallels with illnesses such as heart diseases, some cancers and strokes; these illnesses don’t just suddenly happen either. If we look at heart disease, it’s often the result of damaging behaviors practiced over many years, behaviors such as smokïng, lack of exercise and a diet high in saturated fat. Strokes are a result of similar behaviors and cancers too, particularly heavy smokïng and drinking, as you know. So how do stressful illnesses such as stress, depression and anxiety compare? Stress is also the product of harmful mental habits and behaviors.

These habits and behaviors are developed and practiced over years -- since childhood in most cases. These are the mental processes that enable us to make sense of our lives and the circumstances we’re faced with. When we reach adulthood, we perform them automatically because we’ve learned these behaviors by repetition. Think of it like learning to drive a car. Initially, the skills required to control the vehicle need conscious thought. It seems really difficult, doesn’t it? But once we perform them for sufficient periods, we drive on auto-pilot. We master the required skills by repetition.

Here’s the key: if we eat healthy food, take regular exercise, cut out harmful behaviors such as smokïng and drinking, we improve our health and drastically reduce the risk of heart disease, cancer and strokes. We are repeating good habits, habits that will give our physical well being a huge boost. It’s exactly the same for stress. What’s important to understand is that not everyone becomes stressed or depressed -- even when tragic and traumatic circumstances happen to them. Just like people who lead a healthy lifestyle and avoid harmful habits and behaviors, people don’t become stressed or depressed because they have learned effective habits and behaviors that prevent stress from arising. This is very good news if you suffer from these illnesses. Just as we can learn habits and behaviors that cause us to become highly stressed, depressed or anxious, we can learn the habits and behaviors that stop these terrible illnesses in their tracks.

The more often we make use of them, we’ll soon begin to perform them automatically, and our mental health will benefit enormously. No more feeling stressed out. No more feeling unable to cope. No more anxiety and no more depression. EVER. I’m living proof of this. For five years, a series of traumatic events sent me spiraling into an anxiety-induced depression nightmare. I came out of it by learning the natural skills that starve these illnesses. The more I used them, the less anxious I became.
They’re nöw as natural to me as driving a car, and I’ve completely eradicated anxiety and depression from my life. You can do it too.

Copyright 2005 Christopher Green

About the Author:

Chris Green is the author of "Conquering Stress," a special program which will show you how to conquer stressful illnesses such as depression, anxiety, panic and worry permanently and without taking powerful drugs. For a FRËE e-course, please go to: http://www.conqueringstress.com

YOU HAVE THE POWER TO LIVE YOUR DREAMS

-------------------------------------------------

The day you take complete responsibility for yourself, the day you stop making any excuses, that's the day you start moving down the road to success.

No one else can do it for you. Only you can make it happen. You're the only one that has to live your life.

Success on any major scale requires you to accept responsibility. It's up to you to choose the thoughts and actions that will lead you to success.

Your life will be what you make of it. Nothing will ever happen by itself. Success will come your way once you realize that you have to make it come your way by your own actions.

The power to succeed is yours alone.


©2005 by Max Steingart

Monday, December 26, 2005

In The Open Air

-------------------------------------------------
Spending Time In Nature

In this modern age, we spend so much time indoors, focused on the busyness of our lives and disconnected from the earth. But much of what we truly need can only be found under the naked sky, alongside tall trees, on open plains, or in the sound of running water. Spending time in nature allows us to commune with other living beings and to find comfort in the nurturing embrace of Mother Earth. You can't help but experience a different sense of self while walking in a wood or traversing a mountainside. Being in nature connects us to the earth, grounding us as we walk, unhindered by concrete, upon her. Surrounded by other living beings, both bigger and smaller than we are, we remember that human beings are simply one form of life in this vast universe.

Because we instinctively know that nature is good for us on many levels, it's not unusual to feel powerfully drawn to it. Even if you live in a city or find it difficult to travel to a forest or the countryside, there are a myriad ways to reconnect with nature. When you step out of your door each morning, pause for a minute and close your eyes long enough to let your senses absorb your surroundings. Listen and breathe deeply, until you hear the wind rustling through branches, smell rain on damp grass, and see the reflection of leaves brushing up against windowpanes. If you have time, crouch down and closely examine any nearby grass and soil. The sights, sounds, smells, and sensations we experience that are part of nature can remind us of all the gifts Mother Earth grants us each day.

Spending time connecting with nature nourishes the soul, reminds you that you are never truly alone, and renews you by attuning you to the earth's natural rhythms. Taking a walk under the stars or feeling the wind on your face may be all it takes for you to reconnect with nature. Remember, you are as much a part of nature as are the leaves on a tree or water bubbling in a brook.

What do you think?

The Fishermen by : Author Unknown

- Author Unknown

There was a group called 'The Fisherman's Fellowship'. They were surrounded by streams and lakes full of hungry fish. They met regularly to discuss the call to fish, and the thrill of catching fish. They got excited about fishing!!

Someone suggested that they needed a philosophy of fishing, so they carefully defined and redefined fishing, and the purpose of fishing. They developed fishing strategies and tactics. Then they realized that they had been going at it backwards. They had approached fishing from the point of view of the fisherman, and not from the point of view of the fish. How do fish view the world? How does the fisherman appear to the fish? What do fish eat, and when? These are all good things to know.

So they began research studies, and attended conferences on fishing. Some traveled to far away places to study different kinds of fish, with different habits. Some got PhD's in fishology. But no one had yet gone fishing. So a committee was formed to send out fishermen. As prospective fishing places outnumbered fishermen, the committee needed to determine priorities.

A priority list of fishing places was posted on bulletin boards in all of the fellowship halls. But still, no one was fishing. A survey was launched, to find out why… Most did not answer the survey, but from those that did, it was discovered that some felt called to study fish, a few to furnish fishing equipment, and several to go around encouraging the fisherman.

What with meetings, conferences, and seminars, they just simply didn't have time to fish.

Now, Jake was a newcomer to the Fisherman's Fellowship. After one stirring meeting of the Fellowship, Jake went fishing. He tried a few things, got the hang of it, and caught a choice fish. At the next meeting, he told his story, and he was honored for his catch, and then scheduled to speak at all the Fellowship chapters and tell how he did it. Now, because of all the speaking invitations and his election to the board of directors of the Fisherman's Fellowship, Jake no longer has time to go fishing. But soon he began to feel restless and empty. He longed to feel the tug on the line once again. So he cut the speaking, he resigned from the board, and he said to a friend, "Let's go fishing." They did, just the two of them, and they caught fish.

The members of the Fisherman's Fellowship were many, the fish were plentiful, but the fishers were few.

- Author Unknown

HAPPINESS LIES IN THE JOY OF ACHIEVEMENT

-------------------------------------------------

Happiness is a byproduct. You cannot pursue it by itself.

You were built to conquer your environment, solve problems, and achieve goals. You'll find no real satisfaction or happiness in life without obstacles to conquer and goals to achieve.

Happiness is in activity. It's a running river not a stagnant pond. Happiness is not in having or being, it's in doing something you love.

The secret of happiness is in having something to do.


©2005 by Max Steingart

Friday, December 23, 2005

The Day's Closing

--------------------------------------------------
Evenings

From the beginning of time, a richly colored twinge of dusk touching the eastern horizon, the lengthening of shadows, and the appearance of the evening's first star have let us know that it was time to rest, relax, and retire from the pressures of the day. For human beings and other living things that tend to be most active in daylight, evenings can be less hectic and more relaxing, as we prepare for sleep and spend quality time with our loved ones. But evenings are about much more than dinner and the feel of a cool, soft pillow. Evenings are a wonderful time to catalog the events of the day without distraction, to revel in gentle solitude or silence, to end the day in serenity, and to commune with your inner self.

There are many ways to turn the evening into a nurturing and soul enriching experience. A simple stroll through the realms of dusk and darkness can show you two different worlds: one winding down and one just coming to life. In the evening, the sounds we humans make begin to diminish, and the sounds of earth's more nocturnal creatures and nature itself become more apparent. As night slowly falls, scents change, and the smell of the soil and greenery become magnified. Sky gazing in the evenings can be a meditative activity - one that reminds us that we are only one part of an infinitely complex and vast universe. Each night, the different phases of the moon show us the passage of time and the waxing and waning of life, as its glowing visage - whether in the shape of a circle, crescent, or a smile -bathes the world in an ethereal, wistful glow.

As crickets chirp and night birds cry out, evening rituals and routines can make your day feel complete, help you unwind from the day's busyness, and pave the way for rejuvenating sleep. Rituals and routines help you say goodnight to the present day, so you can look forward to the next one. While the sun sets, try doing a series of stretches, lighting some candles, or watching the daylight fade. The soothing, natural beauty of each evening can be your backdrop, as you meditate, quiet your soul, and relax into the peace and stillness that can be found at day's end.

What do you think?

The Presence of Christmas

-------------------------------------------------
- Unknown Author

"May I take your wrap?" he said
As I stepped just past the door.
His words were clear and welcoming,
But his eyes said so much more.

With arms outstretched he beckoned me;
I stepped quickly to his side.
With clasp released and belt unfurled,
My coat began to slide.

Off my shoulders strained from the day,
Away from my hungry heart.
Down my back of history,
Exposing each tender part.

"I'll set it here," he said protectively,
"In case you feel a chill."
Then he led me by the hand
And whispered, "I truly doubt you will."

Mixing with others, I soon lost sight of him,
And yet I felt his warmth all night.
I wore a cloak of threads unseen,
Woven from love and light.

"Who was that man who took my coat?" I asked,
But no one seemed to care.
"Perhaps it was my Uncle Bill," Jane said.
"Or maybe our neighbor upstairs."

He was kind and calm and so accepting.
Such non-judgment is truly rare.
I felt so loved and safe with him,
That I freely shed my cloak of fear.

"I wish that others could feel his presence,"

I thought. "I wish that I could see him again."
Suddenly I was drawn to a flickering candle
And there at its base, a small card read:

"May you find grace in the face of adversity;
And see the fear behind a critic's eye.
May you embrace love and joy as they're offered;
And give generously of your heart and time.
It is then you'll feel the presence of Christmas."


Happy Holidays to you and yours.

- Unkonwn Author

LIVE AND ACT IN A SPIRIT OF LOVE

-------------------------------------------------

The place to begin to improve the world is in your own heart, head and hands. To get along with others, love them without forcing your love upon them.

Imposing your beliefs on people will not bring you peace. Have concern for others, respect their rights and freedoms, and let them be themselves. Do this and you will enjoy peace.

Having consideration for others is the basis of a good life. Most people are not against you, they are merely for themselves. Let differing ideas clash, but not those of the heart.

Peace comes to you when you live and act in a spirit of love.

Happy Holidays


©2005 by Max Steingart

Thursday, December 22, 2005

Staying Afloat Amidst The Spin

--------------------------------------------------
Taking Things Personally

Every time you interact with others, you have the choice to listen to, acknowledge, and let go of their words, or you can take what they are saying personally. Taking things personally is often the result of perceiving a person's actions or words as an affront or slight. In order to take something personally, you must read negative intent in an individual's words or actions. But what people do and say has no bearing upon you and is usually based on their own experiences, emotions, and perceptions. If you attempt to take what they do or say personally, you may end up feeling hurt without reason.

If you are tempted to take a comment or action personally, creating some distance between yourself and the other person can help you. Try to determine what is at the root of your feelings. Ask yourself if the other person's words or actions are just reinforcing some insecurity within you or if you can really be sure that an offense was intended. You may even want to ask them what they meant. Finally, put yourself in the other person's shoes. Instead of taking their words as the truth, or as a personal affront, remember that whatever was said or done is based on their opinion and is more reflective of what is going on inside of them, rather than having anything to do with you. You may have been an easy target for someone having a bad day, and their comments may have been offered with no ill intentions.

When you recognize that what anyone says or does doesn't necessarily have anything to do with you, you will no longer feel hurt or attacked. While it's easy to take things personally, you should never let anyone's perceptions or actions affect how you see yourself or your worth. Your life is personal to you, and it is up to you to influence your own value and sense of well-being.

What do you think?

The Father's Gift

-------------------------------------------------
- Author Unknown

A young man was getting ready to graduate from college. For many months he had admired a beautiful sports car in a dealer's showroom, and knowing his father could well afford it, he told him that was all he wanted.

As Graduation Day approached, the young man awaited signs that his father had purchased the car. Finally, on the morning of his graduation, his father called him into his private study. His father told him how proud he was to have such a fine son, and told him how much he loved him. He handed his son a beautifully wrapped gift box.

Curious, and somewhat disappointed, the young man opened the box and found a lovely, leather-bound Bible, with the young man's name embossed in gold. Angry, he rose his voice to his father and said "with all your money, you give me a Bible?" and stormed out of the house.

Many years passed and the young man was very successful in business. He had a beautiful home and wonderful family, but realised his father very old, and thought perhaps he should go to him. He had not seen him since that graduation day. Before he could make arrangements, he received a telegram telling him his father had passed away, and willed all of his possessions to his son. He needed to come home immediately and take care of things.

When he arrived at his father's house, sudden sadness and regret filled his heart. He began to search through his father's important papers and saw the still gift-wrapped Bible, just as he had left it years ago. With tears, he opened the Bible and began to turn the pages. His father had carefully underlined a verse, Matt.7:11, "And if ye, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children,how much more shall your Heavenly Father which is in Heaven, give to those who ask Him?"

As he read those words, a car key dropped from the back of the Bible. It had a tag with the dealer's name, the same dealer who had the sports car he had desired. On the tag was the date of his graduation, and the words PAID IN FULL.

How many times do we miss God's blessings because we can't see past our own desires?

- Author Unknown

SUCCESS IS DETERMINED ON THE DRAWING BOARD

-------------------------------------------------

It isn't enough to just want to be successful. You've got to ask yourself: "What are you going to do to get the things in life you want?"

Your problem is to bridge the distance which exists between where you are now and the goal you intend to reach. Planning brings your future into the present so you can do something about it now.

Somewhere there is a map of how it can be done. All you need is a good plan, and the courage to press on to your destination.

A well built house started with a definite purpose and a set of blueprints. Your plan should provide the pattern for the actions you'll take.

Take time each day to study, think and plan. Plan your steps, then implement your plan, then review your results. Do this frequently and make the appropriate alterations to your plan, and you'll develop the power that will bring you to success.

No one was ever lost on a straight road.


©2005 by Max Steingart

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Lessons Of Discovery

-------------------------------------------------
Instruction Manuals For Living

Depending on what stage we are in our lives, we can sometimes feel like we ought to know more about who we are or how to live. We may even berate ourselves for making the same mistakes, or for just not "getting it," whatever "it" may be. We wonder how our lives would be now, if only we had "known better." During moments like these, it is important to remember that none of us are born with instruction manuals and that learning lessons is a lifelong journey.

Inherent to our being born is that we are here to observe, learn, and grow. Accompanying this is a built-in guarantee that there will be mistakes and misadventures along the way. And while it is only natural that we may sometimes become overwhelmed, especially when the lessons keep coming, it is important to remember that learning to understand yourself and your world is an ongoing and active process where the journey is more important than the destination. Every lesson is intended so you can become more of who you are. And as you grow through this self-discovery, you begin to create your own instruction manual. The "how's" and "why's" are yours to discover, and part of the beauty of being alive is that these rules are always changing.

If you feel that you would like to explore what your personal instruction manual may already say, then try writing down in order some of the significant events that have happened to you. It's also important to take note of what you learned from each one. When you are done, you may be surprised to discover how much you are always growing, and that every lesson learned always informs the next. That being said, there is never any need to be hard on yourself or think that you should have it all figured out. We always know as much as we're meant to know at that moment, and growing into our fullness is a process that unfolds in divine timing. You and your life are beautiful works in progress. Discover yourself and embrace your life's lessons, and your instruction manual will create itself.

What do you think?

Coping Statements

----------------------------------------------------
– By Robert F. Sarmiento, Ph.D.

Learning how to manage your feelings and behaviors takes work and practice. However, one simple way to get started is to develop "coping statements" to counter upsetting thoughts. Coping statements are somewhat like affirmations, but they are not necessarily positive ideas. Rather, they are realistic or reality based. Coping statements are usually challenges to specific upsetting thoughts, although you can use them any time.

The idea hëre is to stop yourself whenever you feel upset, anxious, worried, depressed, angry, guilty, ashamed, frustrated and so on. You can also use undesired urges or behavior, like procrastination, smokïng, drinking or drugging, as a cue to start the process. Catch yourself, then try to observe what thoughts are running through your mind. Take a sheet of paper and divide it in half vertically. On the left side of the sheet, write out whatever thoughts you have observed.

Once you have identified the offending thoughts, just try changing them. As you get into this more, you will probably want to learn how to dispute or evaluate your thoughts on several levels, but the simple förm of this exercise is to change the thoughts in any way that helps you feel or behave differently. Keep trying different alternatives until you find one that works for you. Hëre are some examples to help you get started:

1. Upsetting Thought: I'm going to fail.

Realistic Alternative: I'll probably do all right, but even if I don't, it's not the end of the world.

2. Upsetting Thought: I can't stand it.

Realistic Alternative: I don't like it, but I can stand it.

3. Upsetting Thought: I'll nevër amount to anything.

Realistic Alternative: It may be difficult, but if I try, I can accomplish a lot.

4. Upsetting Thought: That's awful.

Realistic Alternative: It's bad, but it could be much worse.

5. Upsetting Thought: I must be a loser because this person doesn't like me.

Realistic Alternative: I want to be liked, but not everyone will like me.

6. Upsetting Thought: I need love.

Realistic Alternative: I want love, but I can live without it.

7. Upsetting Thought: That S.O. B.!

Realistic Alternative: I don't like some of his actions, but he is not all bad.

8. Upsetting Thought: I'm not in the mood to do that.

Realistic Alternative: Tough! If I want the advantages of doing this, I had better go ahead and get it out of the way.

9. Upsetting Thought: I'm going to get fired.

Realistic Alternative: I might be fired, but probably won't be. Being fired would be a setback, but I can deal with it.

10. Upsetting Thought: I need a drink.

Realistic Alternative: I want a drink, but I don't need it. I might feel better nöw, but I'll regret it tomorrow.

Hopefully, you get the idea. Try it! I think you will like the results. Not only will you feel better, but you will probably find that you have a lot more energy to put into solving the real problems in your life, not just wasting energy on getting needlessly upset.

Robert F. Sarmiento, Ph.D. © 2002. All rights reserved.

About the Author:

Dr. Rob Sarmiento is a licensed psychologist in practice since 1976 in Houston, Texas. He has developed a powerful Psychology Self-Help Website with tools, articles and information about his consulting services. He provides consulting services for mental health, human resources, lëgal and business professionals. You can visit his website at http://www.cyberpsych.com

NEVER SAY NEVER

------------------------------------------------

There is no such thing as no chance. Don't think about the things you can't do. Think about the things you can do.

No matter what the level of your ability is, you have more potential than you can ever develop in a lifetime.

You have powers you never dreamed of. You can do things you never thought you could do. There are no limitations to what you can do except the limitations of your own mind.

Your range of available choices right now is limitless. Look at things as they can be.


©2005 by Max Steingart

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

What Matters

-------------------------------------------------
Getting Back To Holiday Basics

The true meaning of the holidays can easily get lost in the details. While many of the diverse festivals and feasts we celebrate are designed to be times for celebrating life, new beginnings, traditions, and landmark occasions, those sentiments can be swept away by the stress of overloaded to-do lists and seemingly never-ending holiday obligations. Yet there are many unique and satisfying ways to celebrate the holidays without spending too much money or becoming exhausted in the process. Whereas the media, and possibly even loved ones, may encourage you to do and buy more, concentrating on the spirit of faith, giving, love, and hope during the holidays can help you do more with less. You can create new holiday traditions that help you focus on what you find important.

Holidays can be a wonderful time for taking stock of what matters most to you. This can include family, community, helping those less fortunate, and loving the earth. If you feel driven to give the people in your life gifts, consider presents that encourage positive living or whose impact will continue to be felt long after the holidays. Think about donating your effort to making someone else's life better by hosting a party for seniors or volunteering at a homeless shelter. You can also make a charitable donation or plant a seedling tree in a loved one's name. Instead of giving your friends and family material goods, give them the gift of your time. Organize get-togethers that include relatives or acquaintances that you seldom see and emphasize togetherness, fun, and celebration. Time spent making homemade gifts can give you a chance to ruminate on what you treasure about your loved ones.

When exploring the true meaning of the holidays and getting back to the true spirit of the season, allow yourself to alter existing traditions. Even a blessing before a meal or a walk under the stars can help you reconnect with the holidays. Do what fulfills you and then stop before your celebration becomes more of a hassle than a happy occasion. Get back to the basics of generosity and goodwill, and your holiday will certainly be a rewarding one.

What do you think?

Savoring, Happiness, and the Unfortunate Cheese Incident

----------------------------------------------------
- By Deanna Davis, Ph.D.

It was nearly 1:00 a.m. in the midst of a particularly ruthless poker game on the first Thanksgiving weekend I spent with my husband's family. That's when I uttered the words I'm sure I'll nevër live down. It was one of those moments when you wish the world provided a rewind button to allow you to opt out of an experience you would rather forget.

During the delicate “get to know you” phase with my in-laws, I had made a memorable first impression by spending most of the evening carting around an enormous block of cheese from a nöw defunct dairy in Wisconsin. I always specify the “nöw-defunctness” of this dairy because if I don’t, I get scads of inquiries asking where people might find this one-of-a-kind cheese. Cheese, I’ve found, is one of the great unifiers of modern society. The sad truth is you can't buy this cheese anymore, which proves
my point that it’s absolutely critical to savor pleasurable experiences while you have the chance!

In any case, on the night in question, as I sliced another paper-thin piece of this dairy delicacy and held it to my tongue, I innocently thought to myself, "This cheese makes me happy." It proved to be one of those awkward moments when you realize you have just audibly shared thoughts that you intended for your own internal enjoyment. I stared down at the table. And then at the cheese. And then, ever so begrudgingly, I looked up at my future in-laws.

Feeling a bit horrified and infinitely self-conscious, I reluctantly met their gazes. Every last bloodshot, poker-worn eye stared blankly at me for one very long, painfully quiet moment. And then the room exploded in laughter. After that, every time I showed even the slightest fondness for anything new, one of my loving new family members would ask, "Yes, but does it make you as happy as that cheese?"

Embarrassment and life-long torment aside, what I nöw realize is that this culinary ego-crashing adventure was actually a förm of one of the healthier ways to increase pleasure and happiness in the present moment. Yes, science has a respectable name for what I nöw refer to as "the unfortunate cheese incident." Positive psychology experts like Martin Seligman (author of Authentic Happiness) call it "savoring," and they say that it is a good thing. Thank goodness I have science to back me up hëre.

The great thing about savoring is that it's easy to do and it's absolutely frëe. What could be better than something frëe and easy? Except maybe a gigantic brick of creamy cheese. OK, enough about the cheese and on to the practical steps. Hëre's how to enhance your life by savoring:

* Learn how to savor. Savoring is all about being in the moment, so stop everything else you're doing--even if only for 30 seconds--and really focus on an experience you're having. For instance, try immersing yourself in that first cup of coffee or tea in the morning (or at least the first couple of sips), enjoy the scent, the heat, the taste and the memories you associate with it. Filter out all other senses and focus exclusively on this one...what do you notice? Being in the moment enhances pleasure in more ways than you'll ever know.

* Make a daily habit of savoring. Once you've mastered the savoring skill, identify one activity or opportunïty each day to savor with abandon. Consider both ordinary and special events--savoring the smell of morning dew on the grass can be just as powerful and potent as the smell of success that comes from a new promotion. Savor a range of delights.

* Space out your pleasures. Too much of a good thing is...well...too much of a good thing. Our synapses crave novelty, and our nerves like newness. That's why it's important to experience different types of pleasures all the time and to space them out over time. This is why a massage feels best if you haven't had one in a while and why your favorite CD gives you more chills if it's been a month since you've listened to it. So mix it up and keep it fresh...keep those pleasures coming at random intervals.

* Try your hand at collective savoring. Pleasures can be dramatically heightened when they're shared with others. A fabulous meal just tastes better when you're sharing it with someone else, and a walk through a beautiful park takes your breath away with a fun companion at your side.

* Don't stop at savoring. Savoring is a step in the right direction, but it's only one element of joyful living. Strategies like practicing gratitude, seeking flow experiences, and weaving more laughter and silliness into your life are all contributors to enduring happiness. Build up your toolkit for the life of your dreams by trying all of these strategies, and watch them enhance both your quality of life nöw and your opportunïty for a lifetïme of joy and fulfillment.

About the Author:

Deanna Davis is the author of the book Living With Intention: Designing a Wildly Fulfilling and Remarkably Successful Life. Receive valuable frëe bonus gifts from world-renowned experts when you purchase Living With Intention. Learn more at http://www.deannadavis.net

YOU CAN ACHIEVE ANYTHING YOU IMAGINE

------------------------------------------------

Picture yourself in your mind's eye as having already achieved your goal. See yourself doing the things you'll be doing when you've reached your destination.

Your imagination is your mental workshop where all your plans are fashioned. Visualize your goals and you'll get your subconscious to work toward making your mental pictures come true.

Olympic medalists use the art of mental rehearsal or visualization. They mentally run through important events before they happen.

Decide what you want out of your life. Sense it before you have it. See it, feel it, taste it, smell it and imagine the emotions associated with the attainment of your goal. Pre-live it in your mind before you have it. Your vision will become a powerful driving force in your life.

See the things you want as already yours, and one day, they will be yours.


©2005 by Max Steingart

Monday, December 19, 2005

Beings Of Light

-------------------------------------------------
Human Angels

During each of our journeys, there are those inevitable moments when someone comes into our life at precisely the right time and says or does precisely the right thing. Their words or actions may help us perceive ourselves more clearly, remind us that everything will turn out for the best, help us cope, or see us through difficult situations. These people are human angels - individuals designated by the universe to be of service to those in need at specific points in time. Some human angels make a commitment before their births to make a positive contribution to the world at a particular moment. Others were chosen by the universe. All human angels, however, come into our lives when we least expect them and when we can most benefit from their presence.

A few of the human angels we may encounter are in professions where helping others is an everyday occurrence. But most of them are regular people, going about their daily lives until called upon to be in the right place at the right time to bring peace, joy, help, or heal someone when they most need it. You may have met a human angel in the form of a teacher who gave you a piece of advice that touched your soul and influenced your path. The person that momentarily stopped you to say hello on the street, delaying you long enough to avoid an oncoming car or a collision, is also a human angel. They may offer nothing more than a kind word or a smile, but they will offer it when you can draw the most strength and support from their simple action.

You may be a human angel yet not know it. Your fate or intuition may guide you toward other people's challenging or distressing situations, leading you to infer that you simply have bad luck. But recognizing yourself as a human angel can help you deal with the pain you see and understand that you are there to help and comfort others during their times of need. Human angels give of their inner light to all who need it, coming into our lives and often changing us forever. Their task has its challenges, but it is they that have the power to teach, bring us joy, and comfort us in times of despair.

What do you think?

The Cold Within by

- By Author Unknown

Six humans trapped by happenstance
In black and bitter cold.
Each one possessed a stick of wood,
Or so the story's told.
Their dying fire in need of logs,
The first woman held hers back
For on the faces around the fire,
She noticed one was black.
The next man looking cross the way
Saw one not of his church,
And couldn't bring himself to give
The fire his stick of birch.
The third man sat in tattered clothes;
He gave his coat a hitch.
Why should his log be put to use
To warm the idle rich?
The rich man just sat back and thought
Of the wealth he had in store.
And how to keep what he had earned
From the lazy poor.
The black man's face bespoke revenge
As the fire passed from his sight,
For all he saw in his stick of wood
Was a chance to spite the white.
And the last man of this forlorn group
Did naught except for gain.
Giving only to those who gave
Was how he played the game.
The logs held tight in death's still hands
Was proof of human sin.
They didn't die from the cold without,
They died from the cold within.

- Author Unknown

RICHES LIE INSIDE YOU, NOT IN MATERIAL POSSESSIONS

----------------------------------------------

Wealth without enjoyment is little consolation. Your real prosperity lies in being thankful. Your real riches are riches of the head and heart. Satisfaction comes from appreciating what you have.

Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get.

It's not how much you have, it's how much you enjoy.


©2005 by Max Steingart

Friday, December 16, 2005

Intertwined Fates

-------------------------------------------------
We Are All Connected

There are times when we may feel disconnected from the world. Our actions can seem like they are of no major consequence, and we may feel like we exist in our own vacuum. Yet, the truth is that our simplest thought or action - the decisions we make each day, and how we see and relate to the world - can be incredibly significant and have a profound impact on the lives of those around us, as well as the world at large. The earth and everything on it is bound by an invisible connection between people, animals, plants, the air, the water, and the soil. Insignificant actions on your part, whether positive or negative, can have an impact on people and the environment that seem entirely separate from your personal realm of existence. Staying conscious of the interconnection between all things can help you think of your choices and your life in terms of the broader effect you may be creating.

Think of buying a wooden stool. The wood was once part of a tree which is part of a forest. A person was paid to fell the tree, another to cut the wood, and yet another to build the stool. Their income may have had a positive effect on their families, just as the loss of the tree may have had a negative impact on the forest or the animals that made that tree their home. An encouraging word to a young child about their special talent can influence this person to develop their gift so that one day their inventions can change the lives of millions. A poem written "merely" to express oneself can make a stranger reading it online from thousands of miles away feel less alone because there is someone else out there who feels exactly the way they do.

Staying conscious of your connection to all things can help you think of your choices in terms of their impact. We are powerful enough that what we do and say can reverberate through the lives of people we may never meet. Understanding that you are intimately connected with all things and understanding your power to affect our world can be the first step on the road to living more consciously.

What do you think?

"Pink" The Real Color of Christmas

--------------------------------------------------
- By Gary R. Belsaas

Today, a little boy about the age of ten came into my department carrying a pink suede leather jacket. He approached one of my Sales Associates and informed her that he would like to purchase it.

My Associate knowing the cost of the jacket asked the little boy if he knew how much the jacket cost. He said he did, and that he had plenty of money. He reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet and my Associate rang up the jacket for him.

While she was ringing the jacket up for him she asked him who the jacket was for. He told her that it was for him mom. The Associate told him that it was a very nice gift for his mother for Christmas. She then asked him if pink was her favorite color. He said "not really." He began to tell her in a very adult like manner that a few years ago, his mother was diagnosed with breast cancer, and when his father found out, he couldn't handle all of the stress that was to come with dealing with a cancer patient. The father ultimately left, leaving just himself and his mother alone. His mother went through successful surgery and treatment, and has experienced a successful remission. The little boy realized at that point that he now was going to be the man of the family. He made it a point to buy his mother something extra special every year for Christmas.

This little boy would save a dollar or two from his allowance each week in order to save enough money to buy his mother this one special Christmas gift.

He knew instantly that when he saw this jacket that it was what he wanted to buy for his beloved mother.

The Associate said to him, "if pink isn't really your mothers favorite color, we have other colors that she might like better." He said very emphatically, "no" I will take the pink one. The Associate said, "You sure have your heart set on pink." "How come, if it is not your mothers favorite color?"

The little boy looked at her and proudly replied "because pink is the color for cancer survivors, and because I love my mama."

I share this story with you to help remind you of why we do what we do every day.
Sure we are going to have those customers who can be challenging, and difficult. We are working long hours, coming in early, and staying late. It's busier then we can ever imagine. The departments get all messed up. The freight never seems to stop flowing. Frustrations rise and tempers flare. I could go one and on.

The message that I want you to remember here is that the reason that we do what we do each and every day, is to ensure that we help fulfill the hopes, dreams and wishes of each and every customer that comes through our doors. Not only at Christmas time, but every day of the year.

So when things are getting you down, and you feel there just isn't enough time in the day, and the customers are too demanding, remember this beautiful boy and his mother.

Take comfort in the fact that we were able to contribute to this very special and beautiful memory for a little boy and his mother.

For on Christmas day, when she opens this present from her little boy, she will know the true meaning of this very special gift, and will cherish it for always.

About the Author:

Gary R. Belsaas is the Area Sales Manager for Robinson's May Department Stores in Phoenix, Arizona. He can be reached at grbelsaas@cox.net He wrote "This is a true story that I wish to share with your readers. It happened in my store shortly before Christmas. I wrote it and passed it out to my staff to help remind them about the true meaning of Christmas."

TODAY IS THE TIME FOR ACTION

------------------------------------------------

You must be ready when opportunity comes before you. Luck is the time when your preparation and opportunity meet. There is a tide in your affairs, which, when taken at the flood, will lead you on to fortune and success.

By the law of periodical repetition, everything which has happened once must happen again and again and again, not capriciously, but at regular periods, and each thing in it's own period, and each obeying its own law.

As events tend to repeat themselves, the tide of opportunity will come to you. Be prepared and your chance for success is sure to come. Look around you. Seize an opportunity to change your life.

You can change chance into good fortune if you are ready. The only sure thing about your luck is that it will change.


©2005 by Max Steingart




How would you like a positive attitude today? Get a daily dose of positivity with uplifting stories, motivational articles, and inspirational quotes. Please stop by and visit Daily Motivations: http://edancel.blogspot.com

Please Forward This Message To Someone Who
Needs A Little Motivation Today.


Take Care,

Eduardo Dancel
http://www.geocities.com/edancel

Create A Little Extra Income With Me:

Lucrative Global Business Opportunity with absolutely no cost to start. Click the following link for a video presentation: http://www.freedom.ws/edancel

Do you have your own Internet address yet? If not, you should check this out right away. I was blown away by what I saw and I'm sure you will be too. There's a good chance you can still get your name as your very own domain on the Internet. I've already got mine at http://EduardoDancel.ws. Not only that, it's also a great way to make extra money online no matter where you live on the planet earth. You see, Global Domains International has no boundaries. It's truly a great and one of a kind International business opportunity. See for yourself. Visit my web site today for details. http://EduardoDancel.ws

Need more information? Call 1-800-693-6897 or if International, 760-494-4355. Online video presentation: http://www.freedom.ws/edancel

Thursday, December 15, 2005

Finding Encouragement

-------------------------------------------------
Your True Inner Voice

Within each of us, there are numerous voices often that compete for our attention. It can be difficult to decide which one to listen to, particularly when their messages are all quite different, sometimes conflicting, and even alluring. One voice, however, is the speaker of truth. Among all your inner voices, your true inner voice is the one which encourages you, gives you hope, and pushes you to trust and believe in yourself. Conflict within oneself is often caused by dueling voices inside of each one of us. As we move through life, we get mixed messages from the various aspects of ourselves. Some of our voices, such as the naysayer or saboteur, can speak so loudly that they drown out the voice of truth. Listening to your true inner voice - often the voice of understanding, support, and self-assurance - can help lessen and even resolve internal conflict.

If you're looking toward the future but your faith in your ability to succeed in life is wavering, you will benefit from finding and listening to your true inner voice. You can connect with it by remaining relaxed and alert, while listening carefully. If you have trouble distinguishing your true voice from the others, meditation may be helpful. You may hear many voices as you meditate, but the one you should pay attention to is the one that speaks to you with love, understanding, and compassion. It will bolster your spirits and urge you to go after your dreams. And it will never cause confusion, remind you of past mistakes, or cause you to doubt yourself.

The more you listen to and believe in what your true inner voice is telling you about your value and your potential, the stronger that voice will become. And the more you disregard the voices that can interfere with your resolve to succeed, the quieter those voices will become. Saying no to the voices that are judgmental and make you feel ashamed will help you stop being critical of your failures and afraid of success. By finding and strengthening your true inner voice, you will be able to ignore internal conflict and pick out the one that speaks the truth.


What do you think?

Life Satisfaction Quiz

--------------------------------------------------
– By Thelma Mariano

To determine your degree of life satisfaction, answer True or False to the following.

1. I enjoy getting out of bed most mornings, as I look forward to starting
the day.

2. I see the problems in my life as challenges which I can learn from.

3. I am usually able to focus on what I am doing and feel energetic.

4. I experience a high level of satisfaction in my work.

5. I have a sense of meaning and purpose in my life.

6. I do not dwell on my past or future but am able to live fully in the present.

7. I experience a sense of belonging with others -- whether it's with my family, in my community, at work or in certain groups.

8. I am rarely bored.

9. I am proud of my accomplishments in life so far.

10. I am able to accept constructive criticism on my performänce.

11. I have sufficient income for my needs.

12. I take proper care of my body with a balance of good eating habits, regular exercise and enough sleep.

13. There is at least one person in my life with whom I can share my fears as well as my joys.

14. I feel loved most of the time.

15. I actively care for others in my life -- whether family, friends, strangers or pets.

16. I feel comfortable in my own skin and for the most part am content to be who I am.

17. Though I always strive to improve, I recognize my own limitations and do not push myself in ways that are detrimental to my well-being.

18. I am able to graciously receive gifts or compliments and feel deserving of a rewarding life.

19. I feel that I am making a difference in other people's lives -- whether at home, at work or in the community.

20. I can find at least five things to be grateful for in my current life.

Give yourself 1 point for each "True" response and add your points.

SCORING

0-5, Dissatisfied with my present life
6-10, Low satisfaction
11-15, Satisfied
16-20, Very satisfied

A few points to consider in order to increase your level of satisfaction:

* Get balance in your life

Addictions of any kind rob you of your ability to FEEL. Common addictions are substance abuse (drugs, alcohol), overeating or watching 5 hours or more of TV every day. You need to address the emotional issues that underlie these destructive habits and find healthy alternatives to satisfy your needs.

* Strengthen your connections to nature and other people

Regularly getting out in nature gives us a greater connection to the outer world and a feeling of well-being. If you live in the city, make an effort to walk through a near-by park or other green space as often as you can.

Similarly you need on-going, positive relationships with others to avoid feeling isolated. Whenever you reach out to help someone else, you expand your ability to give and receive love. If you lack social ties in your life, join or förm an interest group or offer your services as a volunteer. You will definitely feel happier!

* Seize the moment

Often we feel too rushed -- between commuting, working and carrying out our responsibilities at home -- to enjoy the joys of living. Make a point of stopping to appreciate a colorful sunset or the multitude of stars on a clear night. It's also important to experience pleasure on a regular basis, whether it's reading a chapter of a good book, making love or soaking in a fragrant bath.

* Give yourself credït

Many of us tend to downplay our own accomplishments. We begin to go after our next goal without giving ourselves credït for what we've just done.

Whenever you complete a task or project, take time to absorb the satisfaction of doing it. Reward yourself in a tangible way (e.g. rent a movie after clearing out the garage).

Another way to build your sense of satisfaction is to keep a "victory log" where you record your accomplishments, especially the things you found difficult or challenging.

* Re-visit your Life Values

Reviewing your Life Values and how you want to achieve them can greatly increase your level of life satisfaction.

For example, Rhonda, a 39-year-old single woman, felt she was missing out because all her friends were married. Then she did her Life Values exercise and saw that independence (autonomy) was number one on her list. She realized the benefits and freedom of her current lifestyle and why she had chosen to remain single. That understanding brought her new satisfaction.

Ask for my 3-page Life Values exercise at no charge - email Thelma@u-unlimited.ca

* Follow your Own Path

It's easy to fall into the trap of following other people's expectations, whether family or peers. You need to clearly see who you are and what makes you feel most alive. Until you embark on the path that is right for YOU, you will feel restless or discontented.

About the Author:

Thelma Mariano left the corporate workforce to follow her passions as life coach and writer. She is the founder of U-Unlimited and runs a Dream Achievers Program in Montreal. As a life coach, she helps people to align their life values with their interests and skills and to connect with their inner guidance. Her personal growth column, Take a Moment, can be found on her website. For more information, visit http://www.u-unlimited.ca

THE FUTURE IS A BIG ADVENTURE

-------------------------------------------------

Sooner or later, those who win are those who think they can. The cards you're dealt in life are less important than the way you play them. Every day you face a new deck and new cards.

Carve out a niche for yourself in your imagined future. Begin immediately to think and feel yourself as successful. To achieve your goal in life, you need to project your end result.

Focus on your future, not your past. Prepare for your future, don't live in the past. Relish your good memories and use any bad ones as lessons in life.

Think of the elation, the satisfaction, the joy you'll feel when you've achieved your objective. Carry these ecstatic feelings with you every day and they will bring your desired goals into view.

Success is waiting for you.


©2005 by Max Steingart

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Knowing Too Much

-------------------------------------------------
Ignorance Can Be Bliss

These days, we can know too much. And while sometimes it can be a great benefit to us to know the tiniest details of events, both bitter and sweet, there are also times when knowing less about the future, our situations, and the world, in general, can be beneficial. Being blissfully ignorant does not mean ignoring vital information or shutting out the world's tragedies. Rather, it is a way to step away from knowledge that may only needlessly have a negative impact on your life experience. It's not always necessary to expose yourself to information that will only overwhelm you, hold you back, or cause you pain. Sometimes, ignorance can be truly blissful.

While having all the information you need can help you make an informed decision, sometimes knowing all the information can be unnecessary excess. Especially when you are trying to pursue a goal, the knowledge of all the ways in which you could fail can keep you from even trying. Blissful ignorance can sometimes propel you forward because you never even knew that the possibility of failure existed. Ignorance can also be bliss when you are facing hardships. If circumstances force you to take on a job you dislike, you may enter your new situation with unpleasant and preconceived notions that can likely create the very circumstances you are dreading. Experiencing a situation with no expectations and no advanced notions can allow you to experience it as new, because your blissful ignorance prevented you from having any preset ideas.

There is nothing wrong with avoiding "too much information," particularly when the knowledge isn't going to serve you. When information is emotionally draining, impedes your progress, causes distress, and isn't necessary to your experience, consider letting it pass you by. Remember the bliss of ignorance can sometimes be a gift.

What do you think?

Ten Things to Do Before Year End

--------------------------------------------------
– By Kevin Eikenberry

We attach significance to the turning of the calendar, and when the calendar turns to a new year, it means more than learning to change a digit when we write a chëck - we’ve started a new chapter.

It is instructive for us to think about how we can get the most from the end of chapter 2005. Hëre are my ten recommendations for you:

* Reconnect with an old friend or colleague.

You know who I mean. The person who came to your mind as you read that sentence. Make the effort to call or contact them. But do more than just say hello. If they live close, get together for a meal or an evening. If they live further away, schedule time for a long, relaxed phöne call. However you connect, make sure that you spend time on more than just “the good old days” and the old stories. Learn about what this person is doing, their goals and dreams. And see what you can do to help them achieve those things.

* Spend one day in service to others.

Volunteer your day to a service organization. Go to a nursing home. Rake the neighbor’s leaves. Use your professional skills in a pro bono way. It doesn’t matter what you do, just do it with a giving heart.

* Read one book you’ve wanted to read.

If you are a big reader, you already have a stack to read. Pick one and commit to getting it read. If you read less and don’t have a book in mind, talk to someone you trust and admire and ask them for a suggestion. It doesn’t matter what the book is; pick it, and read it.

* Give someone a book that you have found personally valuable.

Maybe it is the book you are nöw going to read. Maybe it is something you read in January, or maybe it is your favorite children’s book. Again, what the book is doesn’t matter; the joy comes in identifying a person who will enjoy and benefit from it the way that you did. When you give them the book, make sure you share with them why you are sharing it with them -- it will mean so much to them.

* Make a list of the things you’ve learned this year.

Hopefully it is a long list! Don’t try to do this all at one time. Give yourself a place to write and a couple of days to allow your mind to find these nuggets.

* Identify the top five.

Review the list you made and pull out the five that are most important to you. Write them down and think about why they are so valuable to you and how you can benefit from them today and in the future.

* Make a list of the most fun things you have done this year.

You will have fun making this list -- and yes, I do mean make a list!

* Identify why they were the most fun so you can do more of it next year.

This only makes sense. Once you have thought about your “most fun,” figure out how to get more of it into your life -- whether it is an experience, time with specific people or whatever.

*Commit to having another experience before December 31st that you could add to your “most fun” list.

Too often fun gets sidelined, especially near the busy end of the year.
Don’t let it happen. Make sure that you have some big fun before the end
of the year.

* Make a list of things you want to learn next year.

Some things in life we learn serendipitously, and those are precious indeed. But we can also determine what we want to learn and why. Make some of those determinations nöw before you turn your calendar to the New Year.

Some of these are forward-looking tasks, some retrospective. That is intentional. It is important for us to consistently and regularly reflect, and of course when we look to the future we will see where we are going -- and correct our course to get where we want to go.

These items may feel more personal than professional. Actually they are both. If you are reading this from a professional development perspective, I urge you to do these items.

These actions will be like magic in your life. Your life will be richer and more satisfying and you will be moving in the direction of your potential when you do these things.

About the Author:

Kevin Eikenberry is a leadership expert and the Chief Potential Officer of The Kevin Eikenberry Group - http://KevinEikenberry.com - a learning consulting company. To receive a frëe Special Report on leadership that includes resources, ideas, and advice go to http://www.kevineikenberry.com/leadership.asp or call us at (317) 387-1424 or 888.LEARNER.

YOU CAN MAKE YOUR DREAMS A REALITY

-------------------------------------------------

You have the power and the opportunity to change your life. You can make anything you want of it. It's not difficult, it just takes some effort.

See things as you would have them be instead of as they are. Develop a personal plan that focuses on what you want, not on what you have.

Your imagination will show you how to turn your possibilities into reality. Visualize your goals and your subconscious will begin to work toward making those mental pictures come true. If you picture yourself vividly as winning, that alone will contribute immeasurably to your success.

Knowing your destination is all you need to get there.


©2005 by Max Steingart

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

An Invitation To Comfort

------------------------------------------------
Creating A Serene Home

Your home is your oasis. Through your efforts, your house or apartment can become both a private sanctuary and a welcoming, serene, and healthy place to live in and visit. An organized and comfortable home can have a calming effect on you, your family, and guests, as well as be your personal escape from the rest of the world. Creating this nurturing space isn't difficult. Even a household that includes young children or multiple animals can be a serene and peaceful place. In just a few minutes, you can make a number of changes that can turn your home into a safe and comfortable haven that you can be proud to share with your loved ones and friends.

One way to fill your house or apartment with calming energy is to imbue it with a peaceful ambiance that nurtures all five senses. Soft lighting and soothing colors like blue, purple, and green can make a space feel warm and inviting, while pleasant and calming aromas such as lavender and vanilla can positively affect moods. Peaceful sounds, such as running water in a fountain or gentle chimes can uplift and clear the space, while clearing clutter and making the most of open space can ease internal turmoil and dispel negative feelings. The physical objects in your home as well as your home itself can retain the energy of previous owners or creators. You can give your household's energy a lift by visualizing white light surrounding our home, symbolically sweeping out residual energy, or smudging your home with cleansing sage.

The changes you make to your home can be as unique as you are and may involve utilization of space, lighting, new furniture, decorating, feng shui, or ritual. But what you do is not as important as being clear in your intention to set up your household as a soothing and refreshing place to be. Make your home a place of comfort, and you will feel nurtured and cared for whenever you are there.

What do you think?

Self-Esteem and the Mind

-------------------------------------------------
– By Jem Bacchus **

Self-esteem is an extremely important factor in life. It is that innate feeling of high or low self-worth you experience and the value you attach to yourself. It shapes your concept of yourself and determines your success or failure in life.

It is well known that there is a positive and a negative side to everything, and self-esteem is not an exception. Every person has a degree of both low and high self-esteem, and it is up to us all to nurture one or the other, either to acquire a destructive and pathetic state of low self-esteem or to build a good character and self-image through the development of a high self-esteem.

I believe that self-esteem is a factor of your mind which invariably affects your ability to do what is right.

Your self-esteem is that emotion that cannot be experienced or felt by anyone else, just the same as they cannot think your thoughts, or experience your joy. However, others can influence your thoughts to instill in you a feeling of worthlessness, the basis of low self-esteem; also, by their encouragement, positive suggestions and advice, instill in you a feeling of self-worth that can cause you to develop a sense of high self-esteem and eventually a strong self-image.

Your self-confidence hinges very largely upon how much you esteem yourself. Having a low self-esteem, you tend to believe that success is out of your reach and you will nevër develop the necessary degree of self-confidence to attain your goals.

On the other hand, as long as you think very highly of yourself you will strive to attain your desires, and nothing will daunt your determination.

Life is influenced way back in childhood - by your upbringing, your surroundings, and your association with others. Parents, friends, teachers, acquaintances, the Church, television, all play a role in molding the minds of children who believe what they are told; and they eventually build their whole life upon the suggestions of others. These take root in their minds, and once instilled, it is very difficult to erase those suggestions which, as a consequence, govern their behavior in daily life.

It is no wonder that children become confused and cannot rightly discern the truth. So it is important that we as adults "train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old he will not depart from it." Proverbs 22:6.

If children are told often enough that they will nevër amount to anything, they believe the worst about themselves, that they are incapable. They see themselves as nevër being able to achieve anything worthwhile.

Even through indirect negative suggestions by others, children can be made to believe that they are of little worth and can nevër play an important role in life. Consequently, they losë confidence in themselves and are afraid to be adventurous. As they grow into adulthood, they fail to develop a sense of integrity, assurance and independency.

They feel comfortable in the company of people whom they feel they can control because it gives them a sense of importance and authority. When they are in the company of persons who they believe have a higher integrity than they, they become shy and uncomfortable because they believe that they cannot cope and that they are being watched and assessed.

We see that self-esteem is closely linked to self-confidence. The higher your self-esteem, the greater your self-confidence. You feel convinced that you have the ability to succeed in whatever you decide to do; as a result, you become motivated to improve your present position or business. By building your self-esteem, you acquire a feeling of self-assurance and you are prepared to take challenges. A person who has really high (not inflated) self-esteem, by his attitude would gain respect because he would always have respect for others, be unselfish, compassionate, and honest.

However, you must be careful not to develop an inflated sense of high self-esteem and become overly confident since this could lead to arrogance and a false sense of high self-esteem. You can get so wrapped up in yourself and feel so superior to others that you become egotistic and self-conceited.

This is dangerous ground and could lead to your wanting to subdue others, expecting everyone else to honor you while you show lack of respect for them, being callous, feeling above reproof, not being quite true to your words, and feeling good about all these things, believing that you are always quite right and eventually becoming too bossy. It would not be surprising that you soon would become a bore and a nuisance to others who would much prefer your room to your company!

It is equally dangerous for your self-esteem to be really low as it is to be overly high. Having too low self-esteem you will have little or no self-respect doing things that are base and unbecoming, and have no qualms about that. You tend to become unkind and even fail to be quite upright in your dealings.

As is the case of self-esteem being overly high, having really low self-esteem you losë respect for others, but in this case although you want others to respect you, something inside tells you that you do not deserve their respect anyway.

Such persons can be very abusive, believing that they must do this to establish their seniority and gain attention. Sadly, this does not change the nagging sense of inadequacy and inferiority complex.

To overcome a feeling of low self-esteem, you must disregard all negative thoughts about yourself. Do not entertain such thoughts, make every effort to cancel them out and replace them with as many positive thoughts as will come flooding in your mind. You must be in control of your own thoughts and develop the ability to stomp any sort of negativity.

Do not live a life of misery because of low self-esteem and negative thoughts. Endeavor to entertain positive thinking only; also, speak positively and those mean negative thoughts will soon fade away. Give others a reason to think highly of you, because by your actions they will soon come to the conclusion that you have a very low opinion of yourself. Remember that if you do not esteem yourself no one else will esteem you.

Thankfully, there are great measures that can be taken to change your thought process and re-condition your mind to overcome low self-esteem and build a high self-esteem for your ultimate good.

About the Author:

Jem is author and webmaster of 1-personal-improvement.com website. Visit the site for other interesting topics on self help and get your frëe newsletter Aspects of Personal Improvement. http://1-personal-improvement.com/selfhelp.html