Monday, January 28, 2008

What Is Your Story? – By Debra Berndt, CHt

I hear many stories throughout the day. My clients tell me stories of their childhood, recent break-up, new love interest, or the latest tragedy in their lives. We are surrounded by gossip and tales from our family, friends, and even the media. The stories we share are simply an opinion based on past subconscious programs, but usually perceived as conclusive fact. If we are not careful, they will define us. Describing ourselves through a life situation or by what others think about us can become a dangerous trap that we cannot escape.

Our stories also describe how we see ourselves by social status or occupation. We even make statements about our physical or emotional conditions such as "I am a cancer survivor," "I am depressed" "I am shy," or "I am fat." When we limit ourselves by our stories, we do not have the freedom to be anything else.

In order to find our true selves, we have to look beyond our story. Stating that we are married, single, or childless is a temporary condition because our title changes throughout our life. One day I drove to work as a Marketing Director and two hours later, I found myself laid off, and my title vanished. These temporary life situations can never define us. We look in the mirror and see who we think we are, identifying the person in the reflection as "me." When we were five, we saw a different reflection, and we did not have the same stories. So, who are we?

After a while, our stories become like a rerun of "Gilligan's Island." The castaways almost get rescued in every episode, but something happens, and they continue to be stuck on that darn island. How can we escape the old storyline of our lives? A person can choose to remain in their victim stories and attract more of the same experiences into their life, or they can let go of the past and create a new future for themselves. Imagine refraining from giving that old part of you fuel and start living into something new every day. You may not have your parents or ex-husband to blame anymore, but you can be free to create whatever life you choose.

When bad things happen, there are some who continue to tell their story to get pity, attract attention, or feel special. There are others who try to justify so-called negative experiences by saying that "everything happens for a reason," just creating another story! All situations in life are temporary and will change. The only constant in life is the energy inside that nothing outside can change or take away. In hypnotherapy sessions, I help the client distinguish their stories (or subconscious patterning) from their true, unlimited selves. Once exposed to new possibilities, they avoid being boxed in to a predictable future that looks just like the past.

The lovable castaways eventually get rescued, and they have a reunion television special. Sadly, they end up back on the island never really escaping their old story. To avoid a similar fate, stop yourself from telling old stories and live in the moment. You have the power to turn off the reruns of your life. They are never as good the second time around anyway.

About the Author:

Debra Berndt is a Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist with the American Council of Hypnotist Examiners, The International Medical and Dental Hypnotherapy Association, and a member of the Colorado Association of Psychotherapists. She is the host of The Hypnotic Dating Show on Real Coaching Radio and creator of Attract Love Today™, a self-hypnosis system developed to remove blocks in the subconscious from attracting true love. Berndt has been featured internationally on television and radio discussing the power of hypnosis and the subconscious mind.

Visit http://www.attractlovetoday.com

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